


'Cause You Were Born

by FrostyFingers



Category: The Blacklist (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-22
Updated: 2017-01-24
Packaged: 2018-03-25 06:18:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 16
Words: 33,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3800032
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FrostyFingers/pseuds/FrostyFingers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Lizzie and Red are establishing a relationship, when unexpected news seem to be tearing them apart. [Lizzington]</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> You were born into a strange world.  
> Like a candle, you were meant to share the fire.  
> I don't know where we come from, and I don't know where we go.  
> But my arms were made to hold you, so I will never let you go.  
> Cuz you were born to change this life.  
> You were born to chase the light.  
> You were born...
> 
> "You Were Born" - Cloud Cult

She giggled at the scratching of his morning stubble across the soft skin of her neck while he busied himself with kissing every inch that he could reach. She moved her head to escape the tickling sensation. "Stop!" She shrieked, breaking into a fit of laughter.

His hot breath cascaded over her skin and she felt the rumble of his own laughter against her chest. "Are we perhaps a little ticklish?"

Liz pushed at his chest until she had successfully turned him onto his back. "Go shave," she told him with a smile. He grumbled his opinion to having to stop what he had planned and gave her a sound kiss, before he rolled out of the bed and padded towards the bathroom. "I'm not getting beard burn between my legs," she called after him.

Red's breath caught in his throat and he shot around to look at her, his eyes hooded and his nostrils flaring. She had been reserved when it came to the topic of oral sex, stating that the thought of the action alone made her feel vulnerable. Of course he had dropped the subject as he didn't want to make her feel uncomfortable. That she was reconsidering this now made his heart do back flips.

Red swallowed hard and willed his legs to keep moving, keeping in mind that he would be holding a sharp blade to his throat soon and needed to keep his cool or he would end up offing himself in his haste. "You're a tease," he said, his voice low. She gave him a big grin and then shooed him out of the room.

How far they'd come. He had known for a while that she was everything he wanted, but that she wanted him was an incredible feeling. He lathered his face with shaving cream and took the razor from a box and set it to his skin, when he noticed her leaning against the doorway, watching him through the mirror. He held her gaze as he made the first stroke.

"May I?" She asked softly. He didn't answer as he offered her the blade. She stepped closer to him and took the offered item, positioning herself between him and the sink and angling his head the right way. "You can breathe, you know. It's not like I'll cut your throat."

"Well, sweetheart, since our little incident with that pen, I'm quite uncertain of your hands close to my neck," he joked.

"Ha ha," she deadpanned. "Be careful now, sweetheart. I do have a sharp object here."

Red smirked and placed his hands on her waist, his thumbs slipping under her shirt while his eyes never left her face. "I'm at your mercy. I'll do what you want me to do."

"Come closer then and relax, will you? I've done this before."

He stepped up to her, their thighs brushing. Red could feel her breath on his face. "So… you've done this before?" He asked and even though he had tried, he knew that jealousy had slipped into his voice.

"Okay, so not this exactly, but I do use razors, you know."

He hummed and Liz could feel the vibration that ran right through her body. "I have noticed just how well you use them on yourself," he purred.

"Shush now. If you keep talking I might cut you by accident."

"Well, you know how I love to live dangerously," he said and then snapped his mouth shut.

Seeing her so concentrated and fixated solely on him made his body tingle. He felt like a specimen under a microscope, but in a good way, like he was the only thing she cared about in that moment. He loved seeing her like that, loved how it made him feel. Unbeknownst to him, his pulse and breathing sped up slightly.

"Really, Ray?" She asked, reading him perfectly and drawing him out of his thoughts.

"Mhm?"

As she grinned and pressed against him, he suddenly realized what she was talking about. Groaning at the sensation, he leaned into her touch, his pupils dilating as lust took over. His grip on her waist tightened and he started rocking against her.

"Ray," she breathed, her hands moving away from his face, one of them trailing to the patch of curly hair on his chest. "Ray, stop. We're not done here."

"Nowhere near done," he groaned. His boxer shorts felt way too tight.

"Red! Stop."

"Lizzie, please." He would beg if he needed to. Sometimes he wondered if it was healthy just how much he wanted her, needed her.

She shook her head and pushed at his chest, so his boxer shorts-clad, seething hot, rod of steel wouldn't press into her lower body anymore. "We're going to finish shaving. Seriously, how can you get excited by this?"

"Anything you do is a turn on. Especially when you do it to me."

"I beg to differ."

He took a breath and tried to get his situation under control again. "Is this a bad time to tell you how hot it was when you got all angry and went after me with that pen? Excluding, of course, the actual puncturing of my carotid and almost bleeding out."

She laughed at that. Leave it to Reddington to find that enticing. "I still have that pen." Liz leaned back against the sink and cocked her head, a mannerism she had subconsciously taken from him. "You don't."

"Of course I do. It was a memorable moment. I admit that it's a very unconventional way to start a relationship."

She laughed again. "That's not how our relationship started!"

"Well, one thing led to another after that..." Red smiled when she flopped against his chest, her laughter vibrating through his body.

Her lips pressed against his skin in a gentle caress. "I would love to see people's reactions to that," she said.

Not that they could tell anyone.

"Are you gonna finish this?" He asked after a while, though his own arms were still wrapped tightly around her smaller frame.

"Are you gonna stop getting excited?"

He rolled his eyes, but angled his head so she could resume shaving him. "Maybe."

Liz continued, taking care not to hurt him, and soon she had cleared his face of the white cream. "There. All done," she said, kissing his smooth cheek. "That wasn't too hard, was it?"

"Well, you could always step closer and see for yourself."

"Ray!" She playfully slapped his chest. "Get your mind out of the gutter."

He grinned and leaned in to peck her mouth before reaching over and plucking a small bottle from the shelf behind her. "Also, we're not done yet," he added, pressing the bottle into her hand.

She opened it and held it under her nose to take a sniff, her eyelids fluttering shut as the familiar scent flooded her senses.

"Really, Lizzie," he purred, his voice low. "That gets you excited?"

Her eyes re-opened and he saw that her crystal blue irises were all but completely swallowed up by dilated pupils. "What can I say? I love the way you smell."

He growled and pulled her against him again, his lips descending upon hers as he pressed her against the counter, his hands slipping beneath the shirt. "This needs to go." He tugged at the offending item.

Liz turned her head and kissed his chin. "Yep, because I'm taking a shower now."

"Lizzie…" He whined into the crook of her neck.

"Now, get rid of these boxers and move that fine piece of ass," she told him, unbuttoning the dress shirt she was wearing. She loved wearing his shirts to bed.

"Mhm?" He lifted his head from her shoulder, watching her expose her skin.

"I need someone to wash my back, after all." She winked, sidestepping him.

"Mhmm…" He hummed, pushing the boxer shorts down his legs and following her into the shower. "Lizzie?" Red asked, hugging her from behind.

"Yeah?"

"'Fine piece of ass?'"

She grinned to herself and then reached back to deliver a gentle smack to his butt. "And what a fine piece of ass it is."

LizzingtonLizzingtonLizzington

Though Red had begun to spend most of his time with her, whether it was on the clock or at one of his safe houses, Liz still wasn't quite sure if they were… exclusive. Not that she wanted anyone else, but he was a natural flirt, after all.  
They still hadn't talked about whatever it was that they were doing.

She had to know now though, because what she had found out would change everything.

Liz shut off her car's engine and leaned back in the driver's seat, closing her eyes for a moment and drawing in a deep breath. He had a right to know, and she had to do it now. Leaving the safety of her vehicle, she went up the stairs and knocked on his burrowed front door. It opened only moments later, revealing Red, wearing only dress shirt and pants for a change. He looked entirely too appealing.

"Hello, sweetheart," he said with a smile, stepping aside and holding his hand out to her.

She smiled back, even though she didn't feel so happy, and gladly took his hand, letting him pull her inside. His lips were on hers even before she heard the front door fall into its lock. Her arms wrapped around his neck and she immediately pulled herself against his chest, her fingers gently tugging at the short hairs there. He hummed against her mouth before they pulled apart with a smack.

Red licked his lips, a satisfied look in his eyes. "I love the way you taste," he said in a low voice and both knew what the double entendre meant.

Liz put her hand to his cheek and rubbed his lips with her thumb, erasing some of her lipstick. "We need to talk," she told him in a voice she hoped didn't seem intimidating.

"There are much better things to do that involve that sweet mouth of yours."

She couldn't help the blush that crept up her neck. "You have a one-track mind."

"I can't help it." He leaned in once more and placed his lips over her carotid pulse, sucking gently.

Liz put her hands on his waist and turned her head to kiss the side of his head. "It's important."

Reluctantly, he pulled away and led her to the bedroom, so they could talk in private. They sat down on the mattress and Red put his hand on her thigh, kissing her cheek. "The faster you talk, the faster I can get you naked."

"Red, please."

"You're starting to worry me."

She bit her lip, not knowing how to start, and her fingers instantly went to the scar on her wrist, as she was trying to calm herself.

His warm hand covered the one that was rubbing the delicate skin raw. "Lizzie, talk to me."

"I'm scared," she confessed.

Red swallowed at her words. "Of me?" He asked softly.

She shook her head. "Of your reaction."

"It's going to be alright. Whatever you need to say, say it."

"I'm pregnant."


	2. Chapter 2

"I'm scared," she confessed.

Red swallowed at her words. "Of me?" He asked softly.

She shook her head. "Of your reaction."

"It's going to be alright. Whatever you need to say, say it."

"I'm pregnant."

LizzingtonLizzingtonLizzington

Chapter 2

"What?" His eyes were huge, his lips slightly parted as he pulled his hand from hers. "What did you say?"

She hugged herself around the middle. "I was late and I took a test… and then another… and then I went to see my doctor. The blood test confirmed it. I'm pregnant."

His breathing was labored, his chest rising quickly with every intake of oxygen. "How is that possible?"

"Didn't they teach you about the birds and the bees?" She chuckled humorlessly, feeling uneasy.

There was a long moment of silence and it didn't do anything to ease her anxiousness.

"This can't be happening," he said at last.

"What do you mean?" She frowned.

Red stood from the bed and started pacing the length of the room. "You can't be pregnant."

"But I am."

He shook his head, still pacing. "Elizabeth, with this life we're living, you can't, you simply can't bring a child into this."

Now she was left gaping at him. "What are you saying?" She hissed. "That I should get an abortion?!"

"You can't have this child," he told her firmly.

Now Liz was standing as well. "Are you out of your mind?!"

"No, but I think you are." His eyes were hard, his jaw set as he stood in front of her. "Think about your job, the kind of environment you live in. For god's sake, you're still living in that filthy hole of a motel and you think you can have a child there?! Tell me, have you checked with the front desk manager about an additional roommate?!" Tears were pricking at the back of her eyes. "You. Can't. Have. This. Child."

"Watch me."

He grabbed her arm to stop her from leaving, his grip would surely leave a mark. "Elizabeth," he growled. "Don't be stupid."

"Let me go," she told him, trying to pry his fingers loose.

"Think about it. Think very hard about just what you're doing here. You want to put an innocent child into a filthy and dangerous environment. You can't even take care of yourself, and now you think you can take care of a child?" The slap was expected and probably well-deserved, but at that moment he couldn't care less. "Deal with this," he spat and walked out of the room.

The moment she was alone, Lizzie broke down with a sob, hot tears running over her cheeks as her heart ached like she had never experienced before. She didn't know how long she had been sitting there on the floor, leaning against the side of the bed, with her head on her knees, but at some point she must have calmed down, because she found herself walking down the stairs and towards the front door, leaving the safe house… and him.

LizzingtonLizzingtonLizzington

Liz was exhausted. Flopping down on the sofa, she let her head fall against the cushion. It was incredible how much energy such a little thing could have. Sometimes she wondered if she would've been able to do this all by herself…

Flashback

"What the hell, Keen?!"

"Ssssh! Try to keep it down, will ya?"

Ressler scratched his head. "How's that even possible?"

Liz laughed. "I don't think I have to explain that to you, do I?"

"Hell, Liz, I didn't even know that you're sleeping with him."

"Was. I was sleeping with him. And you didn't know because it actually wasn't any of your business."

He noticed how she crossed her arms in front of her chest. "Look, I'm not judging you. I just didn't think you would fall for him, after everything that's happened between you two."

"I know," she sighed.

"And you wanna keep it?"

"Of course I want to keep this baby!" She answered quickly, frowning at the man. "I will not have an abortion!"

Ressler held up his hand. "Easy. I wasn't going to push you. Merely asking."

"I will keep this baby. I will raise this baby, and I will love this baby."

He smiled at her. "I have no doubt about that," he said. "Aram and I can help you look for a new place for you two. Have you talked to him yet?"

Liz felt relief flood through her veins. At least her friends were supportive of her decision. "I haven't. I should do that now. Thanks, Ress."

She had only planned on telling a handful of people at first, including Cooper, because well, he needed to know at some point, but after she told Aram, the man had actually gotten over-excited and blurted it out loud in front of the whole office. So much for keeping this quiet. To her surprise, her co-workers seemed to actually be supportive and happy for her. Already, they were offering their help if she ever needed anything. It was touching, really.

She had almost crushed Ressler's hand during her labor, and nearly scared poor Aram to death. He had been as white as a sheet.

They'd never know how thankful she was for all the support she had gotten during the hardest months of her life. Her little monster was keeping her on her toes, all day every day, but she wouldn't want it any other way. She really did love this baby more than anything, and even without its father, she was doing a damn fine job of raising the kid.

Screw Raymond Reddington.


	3. Chapter 3

They'd never know how thankful she was for all the support she had gotten during the hardest months of her life. Her little monster was keeping her on her toes, all day every day, but she wouldn't want it any other way. She really did love this baby more than anything, and even without its father, she was doing a damn fine job of raising the kid.

Screw Raymond Reddington.

LizzingtonLizzingtonLizzington

Chapter 3

She was busy unpacking the groceries, shooting an occasional look over at the baby playing on the floor. Oh, the perks of having an open kitchen. The kid was playing not with a baby toy, but with something the little one had found on the small table next to the couch, a Rubik's cube, not that the little one had any clue about its purpose.

Obviously frustrated with the lack of fun that came from playing with a Rubik's cube, the seven month old banged the toy repeatedly against the wooden floor, making noises of displeasure.

"Anthony, stop doing that. It's not even your toy," she said, putting a gallon of milk into the fridge.

"A son."

The unexpected voice almost made her drop what she was holding. She spun around to face the man she hadn't seen in over a year.

That hadn't talked to her since their fight all those nights ago.

The man that had left her life altogether when she was barely two months pregnant.

"What are you doing here?!" Anger crept into her voice already, but she would not shout in front of her baby boy.

"Lizzie," he breathed. "A son." It seemed like he couldn't tear his eyes away from the child on the floor.

She was about to kick him out of the house, refuse him the right to see his son, but before she could answer, her baby boy's bright blue-greenish eyes had settled on the man standing in their living room.

"Da-da."

Red thought his heart was going to burst with joy when he heard the little blond-haired boy call him that. He was a dad. He was this baby's dad. He wanted to cry and laugh and hug his kid and kiss his beautiful Lizzie.

"Da-daaa!" Short arms reached up, little fingers grabbing at the air between them, asking to be picked up, wanting to be picked up.

Red couldn't resist any longer. Taking two long strides into the room, he scooped the small boy up and held him against his chest, smiling brightly at the excited noises the kid was making. "Well, hello there, little buddy."

"Da-da, Da-da, Da-da," the kid cooed, putting his arms around his father's neck, before placing a wet, open-mouthed kiss on his cheek, making the older man laugh.

"I'm happy to see you, too," he said, truly meaning it, as he turned to face the mother, still holding the kid safely in his arms.

Even though it had seemed like she could murder him at any second, the look in Lizzie's eyes was soft and filled with love and just a hint of sadness. More than anything, he wanted to erase that sadness.

"I show him pictures of you every day," she explained. "So he'd know who his father is."

"Lizzie –"

"Don't." She shook her head and he could see tears shimmering brightly in her blue orbs. "Just don't."

"Ma-ma!" The little boy exclaimed, grinning widely. "Da-da!" It seemed like he was telling his mother that his father was there, like perhaps she hadn't noticed.

She smiled at her son. "I know, Tony-baby, that's your daddy."

The little arms tightened their grip around Red's neck and little Tony placed another wet kiss against his father's cheek, making him laugh again.

"He's a little slobbery."

"That's fine," Red said as softly as she had ever heard, his own eyes slightly wet. "Tony."

"Anthony," she offered equally soft. "Anthony Raymond Reddington. I wanted him to always remember."

He tried swallowing past the lump in his throat as he hugged the boy even closer. "Lizzie."

"Please don't." She was already rubbing at her scarred wrist again. "So... you're back?"

"Yes," he replied and she nodded.

They fell into an uneasy silence, the only sound audible was their little son cooing softly, his face pressed into Red's neck. Liz tried not to think about just what kind of feelings were running through her body as she took in the scene.

"Well... we were just about to leave actually." He gazed up at her, but didn't press, at least not verbally. "The playground," she offered.

The corners of the man's mouth twitched slightly. "May I join you?"

She sighed and looked away. "I really don't think that's a good idea."

"Please. Please, Lizzie," he begged, drawing her eyes back to his. He looked like he would fall apart at any second. "I don't think I can let go of him just yet."

Drawing in a shuddering breath, the FBI agent nodded, giving him permission to come with them, receiving a watery smile in return. "Thank you," he mouthed.

LizzingtonLizzingtonLizzington

The walk from her house to the playground was quiet. She didn't know how to deal with him being back after he'd left in such an abrupt, painful manner. He didn't even know how to explain his actions, much less how to make her understand, or how to make her forgive him. At least little Tony seemed more than fine with it. He refused to sit in the stroller and instead clung to Red's neck, happily gurgling away. He and his father were so alike that it was scary. Two silly chatter boxes with absolutely stunning eyes and a smile to die for. Liz knew that there would be a lot of girls falling at the little heartthrob's feet, just like women kept falling at his dad's.

Once on the playground, Liz nodded to Red, allowing him to use this time to play with his son. She sat on one of the benches and watched father and son as they grinned brightly at each other, making their way towards the swings. She couldn't remember seeing Red that carefree before and momentarily wondered if Dembe was nearby.

At some point, she handed him a bag of snacks, and Red sat down next to her, putting their son on his lap and offering the kid the bag's contents. Both watched Tony munch happily away, and the older man noted that he couldn't even recall the last time that he had felt so at peace.

Far too soon for Red's liking, it was time to head back. Tony was already struggling to keep his eyes open. For the very first time, Red had the honor of taking his son upstairs to tuck him into bed. With the parenting experience he had so long ago, he made quick work of changing the baby boy, and then he cuddled him close again and put him in his bed. Red lingered there for awhile, stroking his fingers through the soft blond locks and over his chubby, dimpled cheeks. Tony quickly lost the battle to sleep, and Red leaned over and kissed his little head, whispering words of adoration and love.

When he descended the stairs, he saw Liz sitting on the couch and came to a stop a couple of steps away, not wanting to anger her. "Thank you for this, Lizzie," he said softly. "You don't know how much today meant to me." She nodded curtly, but didn't look at him. "Lizzie..."

"I told you not to go there."

"But -"

"No," she interrupted. "We're done. You can see your son. I would never deny you that, but if you hurt him..."

He looked pain-stricken. "I would never hurt him!"

"If you hurt him, I will kill you." How could she even think that he would hurt his own son? "Is that clear?"

He blinked away the tears in his eyes. "I would never hurt our son," he replied in a strangled voice.

She nodded. "Also, stay away from me. As far as I'm concerned, we're done. If not for Tony, I would tell you to go to hell. But don't get me wrong, if I feel like you're putting my son into danger, you will leave again."

Never before could a woman cut him so deeply with her words, and he only narrowly avoided falling to his knees and crying out in anguish. He felt suffocated, like his heart was being extracted from his chest with a spoon. "I just want to be part of his life," he whispered.

"Fine," Liz replied nonchalantly. "I expect you to call before you come over. You can't just barge into our home. If you want to take him somewhere, then I expect to be informed beforehand, and you will call in every hour. He's also not to leave the state."

Did she really think he would just kidnap their own child? "Lizzie, I -"

"Take it or leave it, Reddington."

After a moment, he nodded. "Alright. Whatever you want. But Lizzie, can we please talk?"

"No. We're done. Now if that's all, please leave."

"Okay," he whispered. "I would like to come by tomorrow, whenever it suits you."

She sighed. "We don't have anything planned for tomorrow. He should be up by nine at the latest. He's a pretty sound sleeper."

A small smile graced Red's features. "Just like you." There was no reply and the smile slowly slid off his face. "I'll see you in the morning then. Thank you, Lizzie."


	4. Chapter 4

He was back at her house at 08:30 the next morning, a bag of bagels in his hand, as he patiently waited for the door to open. He was going to stick to the rules and not just barge into her house. A moment later, the door opened, revealing his Lizzie with a very tired-looking baby balanced on her hip. His heart swelled at the sight.

Before he could even form a greeting, the little man's eyes grew huge. "Da-da!" He exclaimed, squirming in his mother's arms to get to his father.

Red stepped closer immediately and plucked his son from her arms, cradling the baby closely. Little Tony was far more forgiving than Lizzie, that was for sure. "Good morning, little man. Did you have a good rest?" Tony just cooed and began to shower Red's face with wet kisses. He turned his head and pressed his lips into the soft hair before smiling up at the FBI agent. "Good morning, Lizzie."

"Hi," she replied softly, and for a fleeting moment he thought things would turn back to normal.

"I brought bagels," he told her, awkwardly holding up the bag while both of his arms were still wrapped around the baby.

Liz took the offered bag and stepped aside. "Come in."

He smiled brightly at her and entered the house without hesitation, bouncing his son up and down and eliciting giggles.

Their breakfast wasn't as uncomfortable as she would have imagined, but still Liz was somewhat reserved. There was just no telling if or when Red would vanish, leaving them alone again. She could see that their son was already attached to his father, and she was glad that she had shown the baby pictures and told him stories about his dad. She would be lying if she said that watching Red interacting with their son wasn't the most beautiful thing she had ever seen. It made her heart swell and flutter, but it also made her vulnerable.

Over the following weeks, the three of them developed sort of a routine, and though Red was staying at a hotel, he began spending most of his time at their house. Even Dembe had already met Tony and had fallen for the little kid's charm immediately.

The three grown-ups were sitting in the living room and Tony was happily babbling away, enjoying having everyone's attention for himself. His hands were flying around the air and Liz wondered if he would end up being as talkative as Red when he grew up.

"Who's that?" Red asked, pointing at Lizzie.

"Ma-ma!" Everyone grinned proudly at the child.

"That's right, little man, that's your mommy. And who's this?"

"Bam-ba!" Tony exclaimed, clapping his hands and grinning toothlessly, making the others laugh.

"Looks like you have a new name, Dembe," Lizzie said with a smile, and the tall man reached down to run his hand over the baby's soft hair.

Red put a hand to his chest. "Who am I?" He asked.

"Da-da!"

"You're such a smart boy," he said, leaning forward to kiss the kid's forehead.

Tony grinned as he grabbed Red's hand in both of his little ones. "Woo-voo, Da-da."

Red's eyes watered at the words, and he blinked quickly so that his tears wouldn't spill over. He swallowed hard and then hugged the kid tightly against his chest, burying his nose into his son's soft hair. "I love you, Tony-tots," he said, his voice so loaded with emotion that even Liz had to bite her lips to stop herself from crying.

"Do you want to put him to bed?" She asked softly and Red only nodded. "Tony baby, it's time for bed now. I'm sure Daddy's going to read you a story." She leaned over and kissed his cheek. "Goodnight, sweet boy."

LizzingtonLizzingtonLizzington

Even though she was trying to keep it together when their son was nearby, Liz still wasn't comfortable around Red. As soon as Tony was asleep or playing in the sand and out of earshot, she would give him the silent treatment, shutting him down whenever he tried to say anything. At night, she would lie awake because the hurt look on his face wouldn't leave her head; it was incredible how much she could hurt herself by hurting him.

"Right," she started, standing up from the couch. "I have to clean up some and then I'm going to call it an early night. I trust you'll find your way out yourself?"

Dembe nodded and shot a look towards the steps before he also stood up. "May I just say something?"

Liz was taken by surprise. The tall man had rarely spoken to her at all lately, even less than he had before. "Go ahead."

"When Raymond received the news of your pregnancy –"

"No!" She interrupted. "We're not going there."

"Listen to me," Dembe said firmly, his eyes hard and his jaw set. "Just listen, for once, even if it's both the first and last time that you ever do."

Like a petulant child, she flopped back down on the couch and crossed her arms over her chest. "I'm listening."

Quickly looking over his shoulder, the bodyguard made sure that the two of them were still alone. "He was very surprised. He was anxious, but also excited."

"Excited, sure." The look elicited by that comment made her shirk and lean further into the cushions.

"You must know that with the life you're living, the life that Raymond has been living for a long time, it is very dangerous to settle down, especially with kids. You know some of what has happened to his family because it's all that he knows. For the longest time, Raymond has blamed himself for the deaths of his wife and daughter. He thought they were brutally murdered, and whether you believe it or not, he does not want that to happen again. He loves you more than anything, and he loves that boy, but the thought of someone coming to hurt you, to take you away from him... he couldn't handle that. It would kill him."

At first, Liz was mostly shocked that Dembe could actually talk that much at once, but as his words began to sink in, she forgot about that.

"He first set out to determine whether or not people were talking already - the wrong kind of people - and he did find out. We got notice that a very dangerous group of people were plotting to draw him out of the shadows once more. They knew about you and your relationship with Raymond. They'd even gotten ahold of your medical records, including the results of what was, at the time, your most recent doctor's visit. Do you understand what that means? They didn't want you or your baby, but they were fully prepared to use you in order to get to him. So, without letting me know about his plan…" Dembe swallowed thickly and shook his head. "Without telling me anything at all, he let them capture him. I didn't know he had been taken until several hours later. They held him prisoner for a year." Liz gasped at that, her hand flying to her mouth. "He wanted to be there for you, wanted to be there during your pregnancy and especially during birth. Instead, I found him on the concrete floor of an abandoned warehouse in Johannesburg. There was blood everywhere. I thought he had… had died." He closed his eyes. Both needed a moment before they could continue. "The team took care of the remaining enemies, while I tended to Raymond. It was bad, Liz. They had tortured him for months, beaten him, cut him, whipped him... He just barely held on. If I had arrived only days later… I don't think he would have survived. Would you like to know what he asked me the second he regained consciousness?" Liz didn't dare to move to even breathe, afraid she would break down, sobbing her heart out. "He asked if you were well." At that, the tears that had threatened to spill over ran freely down her face. She hugged herself more tightly around the middle. "He loves you. He loves you more than you will ever know."

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After Red had finally managed to let go of his son, he made his way down the stairs, somewhat surprised by the heavy silence in the house. He was about to call out to them when he noticed the mother of his child sitting on the couch, her knees drawn up to her chest. Where was Dembe?

"Lizzie?"

She looked up at him and Red could see the flow of tears running over her cheeks. She was trying her hardest not to make any noise, which in turn made her body shake with supressed sobs.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" He asked, hurrying to her side. He was still unsure of how she would feel about him touching her, so he sat as near as he thought she'd allow, though he yearned to be closer. "Sweetheart, talk to me. What happened?"

"Is-is it true?" She hiccuped.

"Is what true?" Why was she crying?

A sob escaped her throat and Red wanted nothing more than to take her in his arms and take the pain away.

"Dembe… he-he told me w-what happened." He frowned for a moment, not sure what that meant exactly, but then she placed her hand over his chest and he began to understand. "Take off your shirt," she whispered.

"Lizzie…"

"Please."

Swallowing hard, Red stood from the couch and slowly started unbuttoning his dress shirt, his body only inches from her. His jacket, vest and tie had gone long ago. When he got to the last button, he let the shirt hang loosely, not daring to move.

She reached up and pulled it from his shoulders, letting it fall to he floor, her mouth dropping open at the scarred tissue revealed. Sure, there had been scars before, a lot of them, but there were dozens of new ones all over his front. A wave of new tears spilled over and Liz leaned her forehead against his belly as her arms wrapped around his waist and she started crying in earnest.

Red swallowed hard. "Lizzie," he started, but the woman only cried harder, making it hard for him to keep his own tears at bay. His hands found their way into her hair, drawing soothing circles over her scalp.

"Red," she sobbed brokenly. He sat back on the couch and pulled her shaking form against him, wrapping his arms around her back to hold her properly. "Oh god, Red."

"Shh… it's alright, everything is alright."

Her hands were clutching at his back, where among old scars, she could feel a dozen more new ones. It only made her cry harder. "You-you only t-tried to keep us safe and-and I… oh god I'm so s-sorry. I'm s-sorry."

Feeling the fat, hot drops of wetness hitting his bare skin tore at his heart. Before he knew it, the salty liquid ran down his own face as well. "It's alright. You're alright, and so is Tony," he told her, his voice breaking here and there. "You don't have to worry about anything. You're safe."

"Are you?" She asked softly, her nose buried in the crook of his neck.

He nodded. "I wouldn't have come here if that weren't the case. I would never want to put you and our son in danger."

Liz kept running her hands over his back. Up and down, left and right, as if she was drawing a mental map. He wouldn't lie. This, feeling her hands on his skin, was more than he could've hoped for, and it felt so good.

They held onto each other for a while, letting their heartbeats synchronize and calm each other. Then he felt her lips at his neck, kissing the small scar she had left all those years ago and Red sighed in contentment.

They pulled back to look at each other, and Liz gently cupped his face and brushed his tears away.

"I love you so much, Lizzie. Not a single day has gone by that I wasn't longing to hold you, to love you. I have never felt as incomplete as I have these past months. Being tortured was horrible, but nothing could ever hurt me as much as your rejection. I love you, Lizzie, so very much, and I love Tony. You've given me the opportunity to have the life I've wanted for too long... A life with you and our son. I had to keep you safe. I can't lose you. I simply cannot."

"We're safe," she replied with newfound strength. "You made sure we would always be safe. But Red… you could've died. You almost did die, and we would've lost you without even knowing."

"I…" he broke off, amazed by her. "I didn't think about that," he told her honestly. "All that mattered was keeping you safe."

With her arms around his neck, Liz pulled him in for a soft kiss, and Red felt like his heart would burst. "You can't leave us. You just can't. We need you."

"Lizzie..."

"I love you. And I missed you so much. Don't ever leave us again. Promise me."

Red tried swallowing around the lump in his throat. "I promise," he whispered, his voice loaded with emotion.

She gave him a watery smile and pulled him close enough so she could kiss him again. He sighed when their lips met and allowed himself to finally kiss her like he had longed to for far too long. Red wound one arm around her waist and let the hand of his other arm tangle in her silky strands, trying to pull her even closer. They only broke apart when the need to breathe became too much, and even then they didn't move out of the other's personal space. He took that opportunity to kiss over her cheek and then down towards her neck, where he breathed in her unique scent.

"Lizzie," he whispered and felt her arms tightened around him in response. He gently nibbled on the soft skin above her pulse point, loving the way she leaned her head against his.

She placed a lasting kiss against the side of his head, the short cropped hair prickling her lips, and closed her eyes. "I love you."


	5. Chapter 5

They laid cuddled together on the small space of her couch, but that only gave them an excuse to touch from head to toe, not that they needed one. Red had one of his arms under her head and around her back to hold her to him, so she could rest against him more comfortably. His other hand gently ran from her thigh to her hip, and then slipped under her shirt to caress her soft skin underneath. He placed a kiss on her cheekbone and smiled into her eyes.

"Tony is absolutely amazing," he told her, pride shining in his eyes.

"He's a little chatterbox." Liz grinned. "Just like a certain someone." She winked as Red gently pinched her skin. "He does look exactly like you."

"You think?" He asked.

"Absolutely," she replied. "He has your eyes, your smile… and your attitude."

He pulled back and started at her. "Excuse me? My attitude?"

She nodded and bit her lips to keep herself from grinning, but failed miserably. "He's also somewhat of a diva at times."

"A diva?!" He asked in a high-pitched voice and Liz couldn't hold in the laugh anymore. "I'm not a diva!" Red pouted.

"Awww." She cupped his face in her hands and kissed his pouty mouth. "You even pout the same." He grumbled something like 'I don't pout' and she couldn't resist kissing him once more.

"Sweetheart, as much as I loathe leaving, Dembe has been standing outside for quite some time."

Her fingers were playing with his chest hair, his dress shirt still laying abandoned on the floor, and she frowned. "Don't go."

Butterflies went crazy in his stomach again. God, how much he loved her. "Dembe."

"Give him the night off." One of her hands left the curls on his chest to settled at the small of his back as she lifted her head to place a series of kisses on his jaw. "Stay."

His eyelids fluttered closed as her hot breath ghosted over his skin. "I… I need my cell." Before he could reach down, Liz had already pushed her hand into his trouser pocket and he groaned softly. Red was sure that she was doing this on purpose, taking extra long to search for the phone, when his pocket wasn't that deep. He wouldn't even think about complaining, unless she stopped.

"Is that your cell or are you just happy to see me?" She asked.

He pushed her on her back and covered her mouth with his, slipping his tongue past her lips as he bucked against her. "So happy. So, so happy," he moaned between kisses.

All too soon for his liking, Liz had pulled her hand out of his pocket, holding his phone up for him to see. "Your phone."

Taking a moment to calm himself, Red rolled back onto his side and took the offered device. "Dembe, Lizzie and I have a lot to talk about. Why don't you go home and I'll see you tomorrow? Yes, and thank you, my friend. Goodnight." He hung up and threw the phone carelessly over his shoulder before pulling her in for a long, deep kiss.

"Let's go upstairs," she said after they parted, swinging a leg over his hip to straddle him for a moment. Leaning down, Liz kissed him softly and then smiled down at him, making to get off of him, but he held tightly onto her hips.

"Stay. Just for a bit." His hands slid up her sides and he gently pulled her down to rest against his chest, his arms hugging her around her middle. "I missed you so much."

She nuzzled his chest hair with her nose, relishing his warmth as well as his scent. "I missed you, too," she whispered after a while.

Long moments later, they both made their way upstairs and towards the master bedroom. Liz clasped his hand in hers as she pulled him along. In her other, she was carrying his dress shirt, because yes, she would sleep in it, just like she used to. Once there, she pushed Red backwards until his knees hit the side of the mattress, making him sit, and then straddling him immediately. He chuckled softly, his hands slipping under her shirt to roam her back. "I love you," she whispered.

His pupils dilated at her words and she could feel his heart rate pick up as well. "I love you," he replied. "You're what's kept me alive." He tilted up his head and she followed his invitation, putting everything she felt for him into that kiss.

With a safe grip on her, Red flipped them both over so that she was lying on her back in the middle of the bed with him on top of her. He tried holding himself up on his forearms, but she wasn't having any of it, as she closed her arms and legs around him, so he would settle his weight directly onto her. Her intentions were clear; she wanted him, all of him, and who was he to deny her that wish?

He helped her take off her top, and then his lips kissed a path down her front, taking extra time and care caressing the swell of her breasts. He had her moaning and trashing beneath him in a matter of seconds, though he had to admit that he wasn't much better off, himself. Making his way down her body, he slowly pulled the skinny jeans off of her legs. Red was spellbound. She was actually more beautiful than before her pregnancy.

He took a moment just looking at her, laid before him in only her underwear. Apparently, she was still going for red, and not only for the color. He lowered his mouth to her skin and started kissing his way from her ankle towards her knee, intentionally rubbing his five o'clock stubble against her. She was squirming and grasping the sheets before he had even made it past her thighs and it turned him on to no end. He teasingly trailed his fingers over her soaked panties, enjoying how she bucked up immediately, and then abandoned the sensitive area again.

The groan he received in response made him smile as he reached around to unclasp her bra, throwing the garment from the bed. Again, he took a moment to drink in the sight. Her breasts looked slightly bigger than he remembered, as she had breastfed their son up until a month ago. A shame really, he would have loved to see that. Shoving the thought to the back of his mind, Red covered her nipple with his lips, suckling and nibbling on it until it hardened. Not wanting to play favorites, he switched sides, worshipping the other just as throroughly while his fingers lowered to tease her through her silky panties. He was torturing himself, he knew that, but he didn't want this to end just yet.

Just as he began to tug on the waistband of her panties, a loud wail came through the baby monitor on the nightstand, startling them both. They stayed perfectly still for a moment, until the noise came again. Apparently, someone had woken up. Liz made to slip from underneath him, but he stopped her with a hand at her hip.

"I've got it," he said, leaning down for a quick kiss which she deepened momentarily, almost losing herself in his touch again, until they heard the baby cry out once more. They smiled at each other and Red slipped off the mattress and made his way to the nursery.

Liz let herself fall backwards and against her pillows, releasing a long breath. Yes, it had been a while since she had last had sex, a long while actually, but it was ridiculous how this man turned her on so quickly. She wanted him now more than ever. Lost in thought, it took her a moment to realize that Red was softly singing to their son to soothe him. She could have died from the sheer sweetness of the scene and briefly considered installing cameras in the room.

"You're such a good boy. I love you so much." Came through the monitor and Liz grabbed a pillow to hug. She was not going to cry now. After some more cooing and shushing noises, she could hear shuffling and then a door closing, before Red came back into the bedroom.

He looked and her and noted the way that she was staring back at him, wondering what she was thinking. "What?"

She bit her lip and shook her head, waving him over to her with urgent movements of her hands. He complied immediately, climbing onto the mattress and settling down next to her. Before he could even ask what was going on, her lips were on his again. He hummed and pulled her against him. Apparently they were straight back to business, but his Lizzie seemed a tad more passionate now, and he wondered why.

Curiosity got the best of him and so he slowly pulled away, cupping her face in large hands. "Not that I'm complaining, but what's gotten into you?"

Turning her head slighty, she placed a kiss into his palm. "Baby monitor."

"I don't understand," he replied, clearly confused.

She smiled and her eyes shone with love for this man. "I heard you with Tony. You're so good with him."

"Oh." Red raised an eyebrow, his lips pursing in thought, before he broke into a grin. "And that turned you on?" He asked, his voice dropping a notch.

"You turn me on, to no end."

Gently kissing over her clavicle, he said, "Tell me how I turn you on."

"Your voice…" she trailed off, her eyes closed and her hands tightly grasping onto his arms. His growled 'go on' made her shiver from head to toe. "Your scent. The way your hands feel against my skin…"

"God, Lizzie," he groaned and pushed her onto her back, both their hands flying to unbuckle his belt, their mouths meeting in a heated kiss that left them both breathless. "I want you so much." Together, they successfully pushed his pants and boxers over his hips and Red kicked them off so that he wouldn't have to leave her side for even a second.

When she felt his hot erection press against her lower belly, Liz decided their foreplay was over and done with and rid herself of her panties, pushing her hips into his to show him exactly what she wanted. "I need you."

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When Liz woke up the following morning, she felt tired and slightly sore and still she couldn't help but smile. Red had been insatiable that night, he had wanted to show her over and over again, just how much he loved and adored her and boy did he. Afterwards she had simply fallen asleep; the only thing she could remember before drifting off, was him pulling her against his chest and whispering softly into her ear.

Turning over she realized that he wasn't in bed anymore and panicked slightly. She couldn't help but worry, that he had left them again, she didn't even want to think about it. Throwing back the covers, Liz got out of the bed and stopped short at the sight of his dress shirt, now carefully draped over a chair. Either he had left it behind or she had a shirtless Raymond Reddington in her house. She grabbed his dress shirt from the chair and put it on and also threw on a pair of hot pants, before padding out of the bedroom. Walking towards the nursery, she was startled to hear her baby boy's joyful screams coming from downstairs.

She tiptoed towards the kitchen and lurked around the corner only to see her two men engaged in a 'serious' conversation.

"Alright, Tony, have you given any thought to what to make for breakfast for mommy? We both know she hates pancakes, right?" The baby giggled and made a grab for the spoone Red was holding. "Let's not do that, okay, bud? We both remember clearly what happened the last time you held that spoon and I have to tell you, that stuff is sticky." Tony threw his head back and laughed and Liz wished she could see the expression on the father's face. "You're a silly baby." She heard him say in a voice full of adoration.

Apparently he must have sensed someone watching, because suddenly she found herself staring into Red's eyes.

"Well, good morning, sleepy head." He grinned and shamelessly raked his eyes over her sparsely-covered body, leering.

"Good morning for sure," she replied and walked over to them. Tony was already bouncing around in his high chair, stretching out his arms towards her. She let her fingers ghost over Red's neck as she passed him and then scooped up the child. "Good morning, baby boy," she greeted and showered the little face with kisses, backing up until the back of her legs hit Red's, so she could settled down on his lap. She wasn't disappointed when as his arm went straight around her waist to hold her to him. "I see Daddy fed you, huh? You have baby food all over you."

Red kissed her shoulder and used his free hand to stroke through the baby's soft hair. "We had a little accident."

Liz smiled at him. "That's why you decided to abandon your pants?" She winked. "Also, I think you missed a spot." She dipped her head and licked at his neck, feeling the vibration of his hum. "Mhm. Apple?" Looking at him, she could see that his pupils were slightly dilated already. He really was insatiable. Liz leaned forward and kissed him softly, gasping into his mouth when she felt his fingers sleep beneath the waistband of her panties. She pulled back and swatted his hand away, while never loosening the grip on their son. "Raymond," chastised softly.

"Oh, that is definitely the wrong way to say, sweetheart," he growled, already somewhat turned on by her use of his full given name and Liz laughed.

"You're unbelievable. And sticky. Go clean up." She gently scratched through his chest hair and then stood, settling the infant back into his high chair and kissing his little head.

"Actually I'm just waiting for Dembe to bring me some new clothes."

Her spine straightened slightly, but she didn't turn. "Oh."

He noticed the change in her immediately. "What?"

"Nothing," she replied, throwing him a forced grin, before starting to walk towards the kitchen.

The arm that went around her waist stopped her. "Lizzie, it's not nothing." She didn't reply and Red sighed, before he pulled her back onto his lap, wounding both arms around her to hold her tightly to him. "I'm not leaving," he spoke right into her ear.

She relaxed in his embrace and nudged his cheek with her nose. "I'm sorry."

He shook his head. "No. I am sorry. I promise you I will never leave you again. I'll be yours for as long as you want me."

"What if I want you forever?"

"Then I'll be the happiest man on earth."

Liz smiled and then hugged him to her, taking his lips in a gentle but passionate kiss.

"Bam-ba!" Tony screamed and his parents pulled apart.

"Is this an inconvenient time for you?" The tall man asked with a smirk.

Liz blushed and hid her face in Red's neck, who in turn just chuckled. "Good morning, my friend."

"Mornin', Dembe," she greeted as well, her voice muffled slightly, since she still had to raise her head. "D'you want some breakfast?"

"Good morning. No, I am fine, thank you. Hello, there." He grinned at the baby.

"Bam-ba, Bam-ba!" Tony held up his arms, wiggling around in his high chair.

"May I?" The bodyguard asked.

Liz smiled. "You don't have to ask."

Dembe nodded and picked up the baby, who threw his little arms around the man's neck.

"He sure is a cuddler," Red mused out loud.

"Just like his daddy," Dembe shot back, drawing a laugh from Liz.

She nodded seriously and then dropped her head back to Red's shoulder. "That is true."

"Funny," Red deadpanned. "You two should do stand-up comedy."

"Oh, come on." She hugged him more tightly. "You are my snuggle bug," she cooed and Dembe snickered.

He tried to look put-off, but he couldn't quite pull it off, because they were right. He loved cuddling. With Lizzie he did and now also with his son, of course. "Did you bring me some clothes?"

"Of course," Dembe replied, without looking up from the baby in his arms. "The bag is by the door."

"Thank you. I will take a shower then," Red announced and patted Liz's hip.

"Do you need help washing your back?" She asked, standing up and Dembe snickered again. "We need to find Dembe a woman." Liz grinned. "Oh, you could be the Concierge of Love then, how about that?"

Red shook his head. "You two have been speding too much time together."


	6. Chapter 6

The water had run cold and it made her scream out, but it looked like Red was far from done with her. He took her mouth in a passionate kiss, muffling her cries as he pushed into her again, his hot skin a beautiful contrast to the cold tiles at her back, and her body was covered with goosebumps immediately.

"I love you so much," he choked out against her neck as he felt her falling apart, quickly losing control himself. "I love you, Lizzie."

Her fingers were tightly grasping onto the back of his neck, holding him close to her as she shuddered through her high. No one had ever made her feel like he could. It only made her want him more. Ever so slowly, he set down first one and then her other leg before he pulled out, both groaning at the sensation.

After she had regained her breath, she leaned forward and kissed him softly. "I love you, too. And god, Red." She laughed, hugging him tightly as his fingers danced over her. "You really are insatiable. I can barely walk as it is. If you keep that up…"

"I have absolutely no problem staying horizontal for a few days," he told her immediately. "With your legs wrapped around my waist, while all you can do is scream my name."

She playfully hit his chest, starting to climb out of the shower, a blush creeping up her neck as she wrapped a fluffy towel around her body.

"Oh come on, don't play shy with me now." His arms wrapped around her from behind and nipped at her earlobe. "You know you'd like to be permanently attached to my… hip."

"Oh my god," Liz laughed and turned in his arms. "You're unbelievable!"

"I'm just –" He broke off and his eyes looked somewhere over her shoulder. "Happy. I haven't felt happiness in so long and this…" He looked back into her eyes and both noticed that the other had wetness pooling in them. "You make me incredibly happy, Lizzie. I don't think you can ever understand just how much I love you."

"I love you," she mouthed with wobbling lips, before she buried her face in his chest.

They stayed like that for long minutes and only very reluctantly let go of each other, when Liz started shivering from the cooling air.

"Let's get you dressed," he said with a smile. "Even though I prefer getting you undressed." He winked and kissed her softly before they made their way to the bedroom to put some clothes on.

"I need to be at the Post Office today."

"Aren't you off until the end of the month?" He asked.

"I promised Ressler to sign off on some paperwork," she replied. "And I don't even want to know how you know that."

Red knotted his tie and looked at her. "I know things." He shrugged. "I guess my immunity's off the table."

"I wouldn't say that just yet. Let me talk to Cooper about it."

"I had planned on meeting with Mr. Kaplan today. I can cancel if you need me to watch Tony."

She walked over to him and straightened his tie, somewhat amazed that he had been so forthcoming about his whereabouts. "That's fine. Aram's crazy about the little one." She looked up to see him watching her intently and she smiled before kissing his chin.

He nodded, chewing his inner cheek for a moment. "Right," he said at last. "I'll see you later then."

She grabbed his arm before he could walk past her. "Hey! Don't I get a real kiss?" When he turned back to her, she could see that something had changed. "What?"

"Nothing." His smile was forced and didn't reach his eyes. Just when she was about to open her mouth, he leaned forward and pecked her on her lips and then turned to leave the room, Liz hot on his heels.

"It's not nothing though, is it?"

"We'll talk later," he replied, walking towards where his son was still sitting on his long-time friend's lap. He plucked the small child from his arms and held him close, kissing his cheek lovingly before eventually putting him in his high chair.

Before she knew it, Liz was left standing alone in the middle of the living room.

"Hey, guys," she greeted, walking out of the elevator.

"Liz, hey!" Aram came to a stop in front of them and quickly lifted the baby in his arms. "Hellooo, Tony," he sing-sang, eliciting a giggle.

She smiled at the interaction. Her son had them all wrapped around his little finger and he sure knew that too. "Is Ress in the back?"

"Yes, I'll walk you to him. How are you, Liz? We haven't spoken in a while."

She nodded. "I've been somewhat busy lately, but we're both doing just fine, right, little man?" Liz asked, touching the baby's back and the boy nodded at whatever his mother had just said.

"Hey, sports," Ressler greeted and took Tony from Aram. It wasn't unusual for her son to be passed around like a football. "Keen."

"Hey. What did you need me to sign?" He wordlessly pointed to a stack of papers on his desk, without looking away from the kid in his arms, bouncing him up and down.

While the two grown men pulled faces and made silly baby talk at her son, Liz sat down in her chair and started working away, shaking her head with a small smile on her lips.

"We're supposed to be off this weekend. Maybe we can go to the zoo," Ressler offered, switching Tony to his other hip.

"The weather looks good, too," Aram chimed in, gently poking the baby in his stomach. "Wanna see some tigers this weekend? Rawr!" He playfully clawed at him, making him giggle.

"Am I invited as well?"

All heads turned towards the door, where the dapper Concierge of Crime was standing. Tony reacted first.

"Da-da!" He squealed, trying to squirm out of the agent's arms.

"Donald, can you please try not to drop my son?" Red asked sarcastically as he took two long strides to scoop the baby into his arns. He hugged him tightly and kissed his little head, whispering something inaudible against his soft hair. He looked up to see three pairs of eyes watching him. "What?"

"What the hell, Reddington? How can you just barge in here like that? Who do you think you are?!" Ressler spat, straightening his spine.

Red raised a brow at him. "Excuse me? Who are you to talk to me like that?"

"I'm the one that was there for Liz during her pregnancy and the birth of your child, while you were god knows where, screwing god knows who! Did you make it to another night of jazz at the Vanguard? Dine at L'Ambroisie in the Place des Vosges? Smoke some nice, fat Cubans?"

Before Red could even open his mouth again, the screeching of a chair stopped him short, as Liz stood and angrily stalked over to them, carefully taking her son from his daddy's arms and leaving the office without another word.

Aram wearily looked from one to the other and then quickly slipped out of the room as well.

Red was breathing hard, trying to keep his anger in check. That wouldn't help anyone now. "You should know not to open your mouth when you have no idea what you're talking about," he said dangerously.

"You have no idea what she went through, or how broken she was. It would've been better if you had just stayed away or died, because you'll just end up hurting her again. You always do. And maybe that last time, she won't recover." Without waiting for an answer, Ressler left the man standing in the now-empty office.

He sighed and let himself fall into one of the chairs. He took off his hat and put it on the desk, scratching his head. He stayed immobile for a while and then made a decision. He stood and opened the office door, spotting his Lizzie leaning against a desk with Tony in her arms, talking to Aram. He slowly made his way over to her and gently touched the small of her back, his other hand running through his baby's soft curls. "Can we talk?" He asked gently.

She looked at him, noting the serious expression on his face and then nodded. "Can you watch Tony for moment?" She asked Aram, and then handed him the kid before turning and walking towards the office, not waiting for him to catch up.

Red closed the door behind them and drew the blinds closed. "Lizzie…"

"What are you doing, Red?"

He shook his head. "I never meant to hurt you. Maybe Donald was right," he whispered that last part. "I don't want to hurt you."

"Wait, what do you mean? What's he supposed to be right about?"

Red chewed his inner cheek and looked off to the side. "Maybe I should've stayed away. You're cared for here."

"Stop," she said, her voice breaking slightly at that one word. "You promised."

Their eyes met as Red leaned back against the wall. "I want you to be happy."

Tears were already streaming down her cheeks as she made her way over to him, throwing her arms around him in a choking embrace. "You promised," she repeated. "Ray, I need you. There's no happiness without you. Don't do this to us."

His own arms came around to hold her to him. "But can I keep making you happy? You deserve so much more, sweetheart."

"But I want to be your sweetheart. And you promised me. You promised, Ray. We're a family now. Through good and bad. I want this. I want you. And I'm going to kick Ressler's ass for giving you crap. Since when do you let him get under your skin, anyway?"

He kissed her cheek and then pulled away and sat on a chair. "I don't know… I feel… you've been doing such a wonderful job with Tony. He's perfect, Lizzie."

"He needs his daddy. He loves you, Ray."

"I love him, too," he replied without hesitation. "And I love you. So much."

Liz walked over to him and straddled his lap. Taking his face into her hands, she pressed her lips to his. "I love you, too. And that's why you're going to stop the track of dark thoughts right now."

He smiled at her then. "Is that an order?"

"You're damn right it is."

"And if I don't follow that order, there will be… disciplining?" His smile transformed to a smirk then, a twinkle in his eyes.

She tipped her head back and laughed, but settled more of her weight on his lap, leaning forward just enough to earn herself a groan. His hands grabbed onto her hips as he pushed upwards on reflex.

"Jesus, Lizzie." His mouth covered hers and he pulled her more tightly against him.

Their lips parted with a pop and both were flushed and grinning at each other. "Even though I've had this fantasy of you and me on that desk right here, we can't."

He growled deep in his chest and then suddenly stood, with her still in his arms, settling her on the desk, not caring one bit about the papers that were falling off and to the floor.

He watched her grab the fedora that lay abandoned next to the keyboard and sat it atop her head, grinning up at him. Red adjusted the brim and leaned in to kiss her softly. "You in nothing but my fedora." A shiver of pleasure ran through his body as he spoke, seeing the image perfectly in his mind's eye.

Reaching up to take a hold of the lapels of his jacket, she pulled him in for another hot, open-mouthed kiss, sucking on his tongue until he surrendered and let her take control. He was already so turned on. She was almost too much for him. That moment, he didn't care where they were. He needed her.

"Liz, Ressler wanted to – oh my god," Aram exclaimed, standing in the doorway. Both looked up at the man without letting go of each other. "I'm so sorry. I'll just… I… I'll leave." With that he turned and almost ran away.

Liz groaned and dropped her head against his chest. "Great…"

"Does that mean I have to stop?" Red asked and got pinched in return.

"Come on, get off me," she said, gently pushing at his chest.

"How about you get me off, first?"

Liz shook her head. "Two words: incorrigible letch."

He threw his head back and laughed, the rumble of his chest vibrating through her body. "I've got two words for you as well: my love." Her reaction was visible in both her eyes and her body language and he smiled at her.

"Now don't get all sappy on me," she said, but he knew that she loved it.

Leaning in for another quick kiss, Red plucked the fedora from her head and put it on his own before helping her climb down from the desk. "How about Tony and I hang around here and when you're finished up, we'll go somewhere for lunch?"

"Sounds good. I shouldn't be too long." They walked side-by-side to where Ressler and Aram were standing, the latter still beet red, while the former busied himself with the infant in his arms.

"Da-da," the little one greeted with a big grin.

"You want to finish this up now, Ress?" The redhead was still glaring at Red as the older man took the baby from his arms. "Ress?"

"Mhm? Yeah, sure," he replied and walked off.

Liz leaned against Red and brushed her fingers through her son's hair. "Tone-Tone, I'll be right back, okay? Be good for daddy." Then she turned to Red, catching him glancing at her with a fond look in his eyes. "You be good, too," she ordered with a wink, smiling when Red barked out a laugh.

As she walked towards her small office, she purposely swayed her hips a little more than usual.


	7. Chapter 7

Red and Tony were engaged in what seemed to be a very animated conversation, both chatting, or in Tony's case, babbling away with their hands flying through the air. There was no doubt that these two were related. She leaned against the doorway and watched the interaction for a while. At some point, the little boy grabbed his father's face in his hands and pulled him closer so they were eye to eye. It looked as if they were having a staring contest now. That was until Tony suddenly burst out laughing, almost toppling backwards if Red hadn't held on to him.

The older man laughed softly. "You're so silly," he said, brushing his nose against Tony's.

"Hey, you two." Two sets of eyes turned towards her and Liz wanted nothing more than to take a picture of this moment. Her men cheek to cheek, smiling up at her. Maybe she could have Aram pull the security footage later. "What are you up to?"

"I believe we were talking lunch options, but I can't be sure."

Leaning down to kiss her son's cheek, she could see that Red was daring her, batting his long, blond eyelashes, and she couldn't resist any longer, not that she wanted to, so she crept closer and with a hand against the back of his neck, Liz placed her lips against Red's cheek as well.

"I can't wait to have you all to myself," he growled softly when she pulled away.

"You'll have to feed us first." She grinned. "Now, Tony, where did Ress put your jacket?" The baby just looked at her. Even though he had been there for them through the pregnancy and long after the baby was born, Ressler was not among the privileged few whose names Tony could say, neither was Aram for that matter. Up until a few weeks ago, he hadn't said anything but ma-ma. If her co-worker and friend knew that the baby was already saying da-da and even bam-ba all day long, he would probably be hurt. Looking around she spotted the piece of clothing and went to grab it.

She carefully dressed the infant and noticed how Red glanced at the jacket. With a grin in his direction, she zipped it up and pulled the hood over the little head. That was when Red couldn't hold in his laughter anymore. "What is that?"

"A jacket with teddy ears. Or koala ears... okay, so he does look a little like an Ewok."

"A what?"

"Ewok? From Star Wars?" He looked somewhat confused. "You're just adorable," she said and then kissed him. "I'll show you some time."

"Right. Well, whatever it is that you just said, he is so cute." She had never heard him say that word before, that was for sure. Red took the now bundled up baby in his arms and pressed a kiss to his chubby cheek before cuddling him close. "Do you even know how cute you are?" He asked rhetorically and then kissed the baby again.

Liz turned to wave at the rest of the gang, when she noticed Ressler glaring at Red's back. This would end, right now. Putting a hand to Red's arm, she squeezed gently. "Why don't you go ahead and I'll meet you out front?"

He looked at her, then over to the strawberry blond agent and then back to her again. "Lizzie?"

"It's fine. I'll be right out," she said and gently pushed him towards the elevators, before walking over to her co-worker. "Ress –"

"He's not good for you," the man told her immediately. "He left you. When you were pregnant with his child. And now he came back a couple of days ago and you fall for his charm again? He's playing you. Reddington is a puppeteer."

She could feel her skin growing hot as anger shot through her veins. "You have no right to talk about him like that. You have no idea what happened."

"Do you?" He shot back.

"Yes!"

Ressler shook his head. "You think you know him, but you really don't. I spent years hunting him, learning how his mind works."

"But you never spent time with him. He's not just Red Reddington. He's also Ray, the father of my child and the man I love, and you have absolutely no right to drag his name through the dirt."

"Where are you going?" He asked when she turned around.

"Away. I don't wish to be contacted until I'm offically back to work." And with that, she left the post office and her co-worker staring after her.

Red and Dembe were leaning against the car, Tony still in his dad's arms as she walked up to them. The older man immediately knew that something was off. Handing his son over to his long-time friend, he made it to her side in a couple of long strides, taking her by the arm and pulling her towards a corner where they could talk undisturbed.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing."

"Lizzie."

"Can we not do this right now?" He sighed and cupped her face, pulling her in for a gentle kiss. "I love you," she whispered against his lips.

"I love you," Red replied, stroking his thumbs over her cheekbones. "Come on, let's get some lunch."

"I'll just get my car."

They walked back towards Dembe and Tony, their hands clasped. "Mind if we car pool?" he asked.

"Of course not." Liz smiled and gently lifted her son from the tall man's arms.

"Dembe, we'll be taking Lizzie's car. We'll meet you at the restaurant, my friend." Dembe just nodded and climbed behind the wheel.

When the three of them had reached Liz's car, the woman frantically patted down her pockets with one hand. "Can you hold him please? I can't find my keys." Before she had even finished the sentence, Red held her car keys up between two fingers, dangling them in front of her face. "How'd you get them?" He just grinned and unlocked the car, opening the door to the backseat so they could settled their little one into his booster seat. Red was more than happy to be the one to do it, while Liz stood behind him with a soft smile on her face.

When Tony was safetly buckled up, Red kissed his little nose and chucked him under the chin. Then he opened the passenger's seat door and stood back.

"You want to drive?" she asked and her tone of voice made him raise an eyebrow.

"I can drive, you know. In fact, I learned how to drive in my uncle's '55 Chevy Bel Air when I was nine," he told her. "Now, get in." Liz grinned and did as she was told, catching his smirk when he closed the door.

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Eventually, Liz returned to work and Red became somewhat of a homemaker. He didn't get bored, since their little ball of energy kept him on his toes, but he was thankful that the mayor was throwing some kind of Metro PD fundraising dinner the upcoming week. He kind of missed his three-piece suits.

That day, the three of them went shopping, looking for something to wear to the gala when Liz suddenly called out. "Oh my gosh! Ray, come here!"

He was at her side in a matter of seconds, heart pounding in his chest as he thought up horrible scenarios of what may have happened. He stopped short at her wide grin.

"Look!" She held up a dark blue, miniature pinstripe three-piece suit for him to see. "How cute is that?!"

His heart rate slowed down eventually after seeing that both of them were fine. "A three-piece, Lizzie?"

She nodded. "I can have my very own mini Red." He laughed at that. "It even has a small clip-on tie. "I'm sure he'd look adorable."

"Are you asking for my opinion? Because I think you've already decided, sweetheart." Liz smiled sheepishly at that. "Anyway, here." He took out a neatly folded wad of money and handed it to her. It looked like it were all $100 dollar bills.

"Ray!"

"You go buy whatever you like and I'll be over there." He pointed to his favorite fedora store. And with a quick kiss, he was gone.

Liz walked into the living room after getting ready for the dinner, and gasped upon seeing her baby boy all dressed up. She had known that he would look adorable in the black tux she'd also gotten for him at the store, complete with a small bowtie.

"Oh my god." She rushed over to the baby and picked him up from the floor. "Look at you! My little handsome man."

"Wow!" Someone behind her exclaimed and she was reminded of that evening at the Syrian Embassy. "And I like your… diaper bag."

Liz threw her head back and laughed before turning around to face him. "Now I have two handsome men in tuxes with me. People are going to be jealous. Aren't I lucky?"

Red grinned and walked up to her, nuzzling her ear with his nose. "You look beautiful, sweetheart. Stunning. Doesn't she look stunning, Tony-tots?" He took the baby in his arms and stepped back so they could both take a good look at the FBI agent. "Gorgeous."

"Stop," she said with a blush and then grabbed the diaper bag that she'd dropped on the couch. "Ready?"

"Dembe parked the car out front," he replied, a fond smile still on his face.

"Stop," she said again and walked towards the door.

"What can I say, Lizzie? You're my ray of sunlight."

After dinner that evening, everyone mingled, talking to persons they hadn't seen in ages, and even Red was being social. Liz didn't want to know how he came to know some of the people that he was talking to, but perhaps he didn't know them. It looked like he was having a good time, telling one of his famous stories, and she had to smile at his flying hands.

She was crouched down awkwardly since Tony was tired of being carried and was instead trying to stand on his own legs. Liz held on to his little waist as he wobbled. The little one was making a displeased noise in the back of his throat as he was trying to move forward, but found himself held back by his mother. He turned his head to glare at her and said, "No." At ten months, he had found his new favorite word.

"Careful, Tony." She was now only holding onto his hands as he tried coordinating his little feet. She wanted to call out for Red, but when she looked up, he was just turning his head into their direction as their baby took his first real step. Liz let go of the little hands and watched in awe as Tony wobbled in the direction of his father.

Father's and son's eyes were locked and the older man took two steps towards the infant, holding up his hand towards one of the other guest and interrupting his sentence with a quick 'excuse me'. He crouched down and smiled encouragingly at his son, opening his arms in invitation.

Liz was afraid the little one would fall over, but Red seemed relaxed, patiently waiting for the baby to come to him. When he was almost in reaching distance, Tony swayed, but found his feet and then pushed forward until he finally fell into his father's arms. Red picked him up and cuddled him close, kissing his little head over and over again. Liz went to their side and heard him softly praise their child.

"You did so well, baby boy," she cooed. "You walked all the way here by yourself! Did you want to be with daddy?"

"Da-da!"

Red swallowed and Liz swore there were tears glistening in his eyes, but he kissed her before she could voice the thought. Then he cuddled their child again, murmuring against his small head how much he loved him.


	8. Chapter 8

"I want to take you out," Red said, his lips touching her bare shoulder.

Liz smiled and stretched like a feline, before snuggling into his chest again. "And where would you take me?"

"Dinner. Just the two of us, somewhere at the back where no one can see us. Afterwards I would take you to a hotel," he said, his lips nibbling on her neck. "and I'd make you scream my name all night long." He was more than pleased to feel a shiver run through her body.

"That does sound very intriguing. But what about Tony?"

Red thought for a moment, before it came to him. "Mr. Kaplan can babysit."

Liz laughed and hugged him closer. "She will flip you off!"

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"Surely you must be kidding, Raymond."

"Kate, it's just for one night. He'll basically be asleep the whole time," Red said in a soothing tone.

The woman scoffed. "I'm not your personal babysitter. And you can stop laughing right there, Mr.," she said, the last directed at Dembe, who was failing to hide his grin. "Why don't you do this?"

"Dembe has the night off," the Concierge of Crime told her.

"Then find someone else."

"Kate," he started, but stopped, when his son wobbled towards the woman, embracing her leg and grinning toothlessly up at her.

The two stared at each other for a moment until something shifted inside of the crime scene cleaner. With a sigh she bent down and picked the little boy up, balancing him on her hip, making the baby squeal in delight.

"He really does have the Raymond Reddington charm," Liz said, smiling at her man.

He smiled back at her, leaning in for a quick kiss. "So, Kate… Do we need to call some stranger to watch Tony for a while?"

"Oh, shut up," she grumbled. "Hello, Dearie. You're a little charming one, mh?" She walked over to the couch and sat down, bouncing the baby on her leg.

"Wonderful," Red said and stood. "While you're getting acquainted, I have to make a few calls." Before he could leave the table, he found himself being pulled back by the arm. He looked at Liz, confused for a moment, before she slightly tilted her head back. A smile blossomed on his face and he leaned down and softly kissed her. "I'll be right back," he told her and then left.

"He really does look like Raymond," Kaplan mused.

"Right? I've been telling him that too. I have two handsome Reddington boys," Liz said, gently pinching her baby's cheek.

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They were sitting in the restaurant, enjoying a quiet dinner at one of Red's favorite restaurants. He was in the middle of telling her a story, when he noticed that her attention wasn't on him. He stopped talking and just looked at her, fondness in his eyes.

After a while Liz must have noticed that he had broken off and looked at him, only to find him smiling. "I'm sorry."

"It's alright. What's on your mind?" He asked, running his fingers over the back of her hand.

"Do you think Tony's okay?"

"Sweetheart…"

"I know. I know she's your friend and probably more than capable of taking care of a child, but… but…"

"But what?"

She took a sip of her wine and worried her lip. "I've never been apart from him before."

Carefully leaning over the table, Red softly kissed her, before taking out his phone. He quickly typed a message and then put the device on the table, giving her a smile. Only a couple of moments later, it vibrated and he picked it up, showing her the screen.

Little Tony was indeed alright. The photo showed him sitting on the couch, his tiny mouth nibbling on a book, his brilliant blue-greenish eyes twinkling with happiness.

Liz smiled at the screen and then looked up to see that Red was watching her closely. "I'm sorry."

"It's fine," he told her softly. "Are you okay now?"

She nodded and took his hand in hers, pressing a kiss to his palm. "Thank you." His thumb gently moved over her cheekbone and then went downwards to trace her lips.

"Anything for you," he said. "How about we get out of here? The night is still young."

Liz laughed when they entered their suite. "You really did mean it, when you talked about staying at a hotel!"

"Why, of course," Red replied, closing the door behind him and making his way towards her. "I also meant it when I said I would make you scream my name all night long." His arms encircled her waist and he pulled her against his chest, his lips attaching themselves to her neck.

She giggled at the tickling sensation and tried to turn away, but he held her against him, not stopping the sweet torture of his mouth. "Ray," she tried to protest, but it came out as a low moan.

His hands started wandering and so did his lips, up her neck and towards her ear. "No rushing me tonight, Lizzie," he whispered, before taking her lobe into his mouth.

"Ray…" She tried to turn in his arms, but he wouldn't let her. "Please, I need to touch you." He loosened his grip and found himself enveloped in her arms immediately, her hands moving over every part of him she could reach, warm and soft lips meeting his in a loving kiss.

It wasn't long before she found herself pressed against a wall, she couldn't remember moving there though. Swiftly, she was being lifted and her legs wrapped themselves around his waist as he pressed against her. Her arms tightened around him and she pushed her tongue between his lips, tangling with his, and moaned when he started grinding into her and she lost all coherent thought.

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"Dearie, aren't you at least a little hungry?" Mr. Kaplan asked gently, when little Tony refused to open his mouth for another spoonful of his food. He had greedily gobbled down the first one, but after the second load he had clamped his mouth shut. She sighed and put the spoon down. "Alright, we will try again later. See if you're hungry then." Just after she spoke the words, the baby's tummy growled loudly. "So, you are hungry. Something else perhaps? Though I was sure you liked this."

She cut a strawberry into small pieces and held one of them out to the baby. He looked like he wanted nothing more than to devour the fruit, but refrained from reaching out, his eyes starting to water.

"Oh, Dearie. What's wrong, mh?" She got up and took the baby out of his chair, cradling him against her chest and rocking them from side to side as he started whimpering. "Oh my, it's your gums, mh? Are we perhaps teething, sweet boy?"

She got a washcloth and wet it with cold water, handing it to the baby who took it in his mouth, a little sigh escaping as the cold soothed the pain in his mouth. "There you go," she said, patting his little back as they sat on the couch. "We'll try eating a little later again, mh?"

An hour later Tony was restless. He was fussy since he was both hurting and hungry, but since he didn't want to open his mouth for the soft food, even though it wouldn't really hurt him to swallow the puree, he was getting cranky.

"Ma-ma," he cried.

"I have an idea," Kaplan said out loud, settling the little one against her hip. Together they walked over to the cabinet that held the alcohol. Mr. Kaplan quickly found the scotch and opened the bottle, pouring two fingers of the golden liquid, while Tony watched, somewhat calmed. She dabbed a corner of the washcloth in the scotch and then proceeded to carefully run it across the baby's gums. Tony had been more than happy to open his mouth this time around, since the washcloth had helped some before.

His little nose bunched up at the weird taste and he made a displeased noise, using his tongue to push at the cloth. She quickly finished what she was doing and then put the scotch away. "This should help some, Dearie. I'm sure you'll feel better soon. How about a bottle then, mh?" The little tongue was still moving around, not entirely sure about the taste. He frowned at her then. "Oh, don't give me that look. Your father can't scare me with that look and neither can you. Now, where's the formula?" He looked off to the side, an unreadable expression on his face, as they started moving to the kitchen.

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She had a death grip on his shoulders as both tried to calm their breaths. They were still fully closed, the only exposed part where they were connected. He kissed the side of her head, where it lay on his shoulder and made his way towards the grand king size bed in the middle of the room. He pulled from her with a groan and started pushing up her dress. "Off," he just said.

Liz swatted at his hands and slowly turned onto her stomach. "Zipper."

Ever so slowly Red started pulling down the zipper tooth by tooth, exposing her back and not stopping until he was finished. He gently pulled the dress from her body and carelessly threw it on the floor, before flopping down next to her. Liz threw her arm over his chest and made a displeased noise at the back of her throat. "You, too."

With a grunt Red rid himself of his clothes. He could now see how she always complained about how much he was wearing. It was like a never ending supply of cotton and silk and he was getting very close to just ripping it off. He was finished soon enough though and proceeded taking off her bra and panties, draping his upper body over hers and humming in delight at the feeling of skin on skin.

Settling in between her legs, he put one of the pillows under her as his hands and lips went exploring her body as if he had never done so before. "Ray," she breathed out as he kissed the little scar on her right hip she had gotten when she had fallen off a bike as a child.

One of her hands reached backwards to touch him and he laced his fingers with her, before leaning down, his chest against her back, but his weight mostly balanced on his elbows. He nuzzled her cheek with his nose and then met her lips with his in a slow and sensual kiss.

"I love you, Elizabeth."

He had taken her on the bed, this time holding back himself, then moved them towards the desk on the other side of the room and then took her again on the dining table. She could barely hold onto him as he moved them through the suite, Christening everything that looked durable enough, not that he cared about breaking the furniture, but he would not take any chances hurting her. After having his way with her against the glass front overlooking the skyline and finally allowing himself to climax, she sagged against him, unable to stand upright on her shaking legs.

He picked her up bridal style and walked them into the bathroom, where he sat her down on the side of the tub. She barely noticed how big the tub was, the whole bathroom really, as he ran them a bath. Red lifted her into the warm water and settled in behind her, holding her close and kissing the top of her head and it was all she could do not to fall asleep.

They had passed out on the bed, cuddled together under the blankets and Red had continued worshipping her body again early in the morning. He really was insatiable, but she had to admit, the strawberries and cream had been a nice touch. He was busy peppering her face with feather light kisses, when the phone rang. One look at the clock told him that it was almost noon already.

"Hello, Kate," he greeted, pulling Liz closer and dropping a kiss to her head.

"Don't 'hello' me. Did you plan on returning at all?"

"At some point, yes."

"Even Dembe is here already."

"Mhm…"

"Raymond, are you even listening?"

"Why, of course." In the background he could hear a faint call for 'ma-ma'. "Someone misses you, sweetheart," he said to Liz.

She bit her lip. "Tell him we're coming home now."

Red sat up as well. "You heard the woman. We're on our way," he said and hung up.

"Jesus, Ray, I can barely walk."

"Is that a complaint? Because I didn't hear any last night, nor this morning. Actually I think I heard you stating quite the opposite."

She huffed and stepped into the shower. "You can be happy that I love you, or I'd hurt you for your arrogance."

"I am happy," he replied, getting in behind her. "You make me happy." He kissed her shoulder gently. "And I love you so much."

They made their way into the house a little over an hour after the call and were immediately met by their baby's crying.

"Ma-ma," he sobbed, holding out his little arms.

"Come here, baby boy." Liz went over to the woman and took her child from her arms. "What's wrong, Tone-Tone?" The baby cried miserably and was about to bury his face in his mothers neck, when he noticed his father.

"Da-da…" Fat drops of tears ran down his face, as one of his little hands reached for is dad.

"Hey there." Red took the small hand in his and kissed the baby's head. "What's with the tears?" He took a handkerchief from his pocket and gently wiped the drool from his face, before folding the cloth and wiping at the tears. "You're extra slobbery today, mh?"

"His teeth are giving him some trouble," Kaplan said.

"Is he teething?" Red asked.

The older woman nodded. "It seems like it. I dabbed his sore gums with some scotch, when it got too bad."

"What?" Liz looked up. "Scotch? He's a baby!"

Red kissed her head gently. "Scotch and Vodka numb the gum slightly. You don't make him drink it, merely rub it on his gums," he told her soothingly.

The young brunette worried her bottom lip and hugged her son closer. "Shit… I was gonna buy all the teething stuff next week."

"That's alright. I'll do that now." The Concierge of Crime was about to pull away from them, when the baby wailed loudly.

"Da-da!"

"It's okay, Tony-tots. I'll be back in a few."

"Noooo," he sobbed, new tears wetting his chubby cheeks.

The tic under Red's left eye came to life as he helplessly watched his baby boy struggle. "Dembe, would you mind?"

"Of course," the tall man replied, gently stroking over the soft hair, before leaving the house.


	9. Chapter 9

Liz was lying on the bed, propped up against the headboard, with Tony curled up in her arms.

Red was pacing by the foot of the bed. "I don't care if they don't have a gel against the pain, I want one, Dembe!"

On the other line, the man winced. 'Worried daddy' Red was even worse than 'worried criminal' Red. "I will try to find something, Raymond." How, he didn't know.

"Hurry, damn it!"

The baby started wailing at the exclaim and Red threw his cell on the nightstand. "I'm sorry, baby," he said softly and laid down on his side next to Liz. He reached out and gently ran a finger over the little tear-streaked face. "Daddy's trying to make it all better."

Tony hiccuped and reached out to touch his father. The older man scooted closer and laid on his back so that Liz could hand him the infant. Once lying comfortably on his daddy's chest, Tony started drooling slightly, wetting Red's shirt, not that he cared at all. Liz covered them with a blanket and handed her boy a wet and cold washcloth, before snuggling close.

The baby seemed to settle down upon feeling his father's strong heartbeat under his ear, and soon he fell asleep.

When Dembe returned, he almost looked afraid, something Liz would have never thought possible, when he faced Red. "There is really nothing, Raymond. They say chewing toys, cold washcloths, and if it gets too bad, tylenol. I am sorry, Raymond, I –"

"It's alright, Dembe," Liz came to the rescue. No need for Red to go all papa bear now and take it out on his friend. "Thank you for going all out of your way to get the items. Let me just get my purse so I can reimburse you."

"Oh, no, no. That is fine."

"No, really, Dembe, I'll be right back."

"Sweetheart," Red interupted. "It has already been taken care of."

She turned to look at the man holding the sleeping baby. "What do you mean? Red, I told you, I'm perfectly fine taking care of this on my own."

He knew she hadn't meant it in a bad way, but he couldn't stop the stabbing feeling in his chest. "I know that," he said gently. "But I'd feel useless if I didn't."

Walking up to him, Liz cupped his face in her hands and kissed him softly. "You could never be useless. Especially to us."

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Red unlocked the door and walked into the house after going to his hotel to get another change of clothes. He still had most of his clothes there and would go there to change, since he had been staying with Liz for the past weeks. They had never even talked about living arrangements, but Red wouldn't pressure her.

As soon as the door closed in its lock, he could see his little son wobbling up to him. He was getting so good at walking, it was incredible. Red had gotten Liz to always carry both a video camera as well as a regular one when she was going anywhere and always have both items nearby. He was crazy for pictures and videos of his little one.

"Hey there, little man." He waited until the baby had managed his way over to him and then picked him up, holding him over his head to make him giggle before cuddling him close, gently kissing his little ear. "How's my sweet boy, mhm? I missed you." He had only been gone for about two hours, but it was true, he had missed his son, a lot.

Little hands were clutching the back of his neck and the small nose was pushed into the soft nook of Red's neck. Tony was just like his mother, even cuddlier, and Red loved it.

He found the woman he loved in the living room, cleaning the mess their little one had obviously made. "Hey," he said softly as he walked up to her, kissing her lightly. "Do you need any help?"

She let one of her hands travel down his back and come to a stop just short of that butt she loved so much. She didn't have the time to have her mind in the gutter right now. Leaning in once more, she kissed him soundly. "I'm good. Tony just loves to create chaos." She poked her son in the side, making him laugh and squirm.

"I'm sure he didn't get that from me," Red said with a wink. "I'm gonna get started on dinner soon. Anything special that you want?"

"For me to not be cooking it," she replied.

He laughed. "That is a given. I wouldn't want to get food poisoning."

"Guess who's sleeping on the couch tonight?"

Red gasped in shock and his free hand clutched at his chest. "But Lizzie… no," he whined.

She couldn't help but chuckle. "You're a dork."

He hooked two fingers through her belt loop and pulled her closer. "Take that back."

Liz cocked her head and then nodded. "Okay, you're not a dork."

"I'm not talking about that."

"I know."

"Lizzie… I can't sleep without you."

She reached out and ran her fingers over his short hair. "Maybe, if you're a good boy."

"I'm always a good boy, but I can be a very bad boy for you as well, whenever you like," he said, his voice only a low rumble at the end.

Smiling she leaned in and kissed him soundly. "I love you."

"I love you more," he whispered against her mouth.

"Not possible."

"Very much possible."

She grinned at him. "The little one's so quiet. I'm not used to it."

"I think he's playing with my collar or something."

Rounding the man, she looked at their son, bursting into laughter. "Yeah, playing is one way to describe it."

"What? Why?"

She put a hand over her mouth, but continued giggling. "Seems like his gums were itchy."

"No… no, Tony, come on." Red moved the baby in his arms so he could look at him. "That's not something to chew on," he told him. At the look on the face of his father, the child's eyes started watering before a little hiccuped escaped his throat, making the first tears spill over. "No, Tony-Tots, it's alright. It's fine. Here, you can have daddy's suit jacket. It's alright, no tears. Shhh…" Liz watched in amazement how the man, so feared by worst criminals in the world, got flustered when his little son was about to cry. It was adorable. It almost made her melt. "Sweetheart, can you find his teething ring, please?"

She handed him the items only moments later and Red gently pried their son away from his shoulder so he could see his toy. Ever so gently, he put it against the infant's lips, until Tony finally took it in his mouth, one of his hands holding onto it as the other curled into a fist and went to rub at his eyes.

"There you go. Such a good boy." Red kissed the little head and switched him to his other side, turning his head to look at his shoulder. "I just got this one from the hotel." He sighed.

"Why are you wearing a suit with a baby around, Red? You know him."

He shrugged. "You like me in suits." Red took the offered tissue and started wiping snot and saliva from the expensive jacket. "I'll need to go back to the hotel for some more."

Liz bit her lip. "Can we talk about that?"

Red raised a brow, but didn't comment. He put Tony on the quilt on the floor so he could play with his toys, and sat down next to Liz, taking her hand in his. "What would you like to talk about?"

"Our living arrangement. I don't know why you're still staying at that hotel."

"I didn't want to intrude. This is your house, Lizzie."

"But can this be our house?"

His heart was beating faster and faster with every second. "If you want it to be."

"What do you want?" she asked.

"To be with you and our son. I don't need anything else."

Squeezing his hand, she tugged him closer. "Then move in. Permanently."

He smiled brightly and she swore she could see tears in his eyes, but before she could react, he had covered her mouth with his and her arms went around his neck without hesitation. Red pulled her onto his lap and held her close, set on never letting her go again, as his mouth traveled over her cheek, to her jaw, where sharp teeth nibbed at her skin and then moved further south, worshipping her neck.

"Ray…" She said breathlessly.

They broke apart and turned their heads, when their little boy started laughing, rolling around on the floor.

"What are you laughing about, little man?"

Tony rolled over to look at them and then pursed his lips, simulating kissing sounds, as if he was mocking his parents.

"You're a cheeky one," Red laughed and helped Liz climb off his lap, so he could get up. He walked over to the baby and laid down next to him, tickling his little belly. Tony was giggling and squirming, his hands trying to fight off the enemy.

Finally, he had managed to roll away and got to his legs. He wobbled back to his father and threw himself across the older man's stomach, drawing a small groan from him. Red pulled him further up his chest and wound his arms around him. "Can I get a kissie?"

Tony grinned and leaned in, leaving his dad with a wet smooch.

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He must have fallen asleep at some point, because he woke due to a dull pain in his back. Groaning slightly, he opened his eyes and the first thing he noticed was that Tony had fallen asleep on his chest and that they were both now covered with a blanket. He slowly blinked before his eyes settled on Liz, who was smiling down at him from where she was sitting on the couch.

"What time's it?" Red asked, his voice raspy.

"Almost nine."

"What? Damn… I wanted to make dinner."

"It's alright," she replied. "You two looked too cute to wake up anyway."

Ever so carefully, Red sat up, trying not to wake his son in the process. "I hope he'll sleep through the night."

"He didn't nap today. He must be exhausted, so chances are good." She walked over to the pair and gently took Tony from his father, balancing him on one hip and holding out her free hand for Red to take.

He got up and kissed her forehead. "I could also fall asleep right now. I don't know why I'm so tired."

"I've worn you out," Liz said with a wink and started moving towards their baby's room to put him into bed.

"Ha!" He huffed a laugh. "The day that you wear me out will never come. You, on the other hand, will be coming very soon, sweetheart."

She had to bite her lip as she gently lowered Tony into his bed. She waited until she had left the room and pulled the door almost closed before she grabbed onto his belt and pulled Red to her. The man wore a cocky grin.

"You, sweetheart, will be sleeping on the couch." She gently pushed at his chest and then made her way to the bedroom, knowing Red was following her anyway.

She had barely turned down the comforter when he tackled her to the mattress, his arms closing around her so she couldn't move away. Liz struggled against him and laughed so hard that he was afraid she might pass out, since she couldn't quite catch her breath. He managed to turn her onto her back, taking her legs in his hands and putting them on either side of his waist. While his hands stayed on her waist, his mouth moved up her chest until it met with hers for a sensual tango of their tongues.

Their lovemaking was slow and gentle and it seemed as if Red was putting every last ounce of his love for her into it. True to his words, she had come very soon, and then twice more after that. Both were exhausted when they finally collapsed in a heap of arms and legs, unwilling to let go of the other.

"I love you so much," he whispered against her sweaty brow, and she tightened her arms around him.

"What were you like growing up?" She asked, her head coming to a rest on his chest and he chuckled. "No, really. I want to know. I know nothing about you. I don't even know where you were born. Is your file even a little true? I can't believe I've never asked you this before, but it's always been on my mind. I know absolutely nothing."

"Boston."

"What?"

"I was born in Boston."

Her fingers started playing with the dark curls on his chest as she waited for him to continue, only that he didn't. "Ray? More."

"Now, who's insatiable?"

"I meant more about you and you know that."

He shrugged. "There's not much to say."

"I doubt that. Ray, please? I want to know what growing up was like for you. If you were a trouble-maker even back then. First girlfriend and your first broken heart. If you've been a hotshot all your life. Oh! What did your hair look like back then? When you were a teenager?" She was getting so excited that she had to sit up and look at him, hope shining brightly in her eyes.

Red couldn't help but smile at her enthusiasm. "It's a long story, Lizzie."

"We have all the time in the world."

After a moment, he nodded. "Fine, but lie down again, I want to hold you."

"No falling asleep," she warned, lying back down.

"Alright, alright. So… I was born in Boston as the child of Todd and Jean Reddington…"


	10. Chapter 10

"Alright, Laura, that sounds great. I'll see you later," Liz said, before hanging up.

"Who was that?" Red asked.

"That was Laura, Catie's mom, calling for a play date."

He frowned. "Have I met her?"

Liz rolled her eyes and reached up to fix his collar. "The little brunette girl that Tony loves to play with. She's a couple of years older than the little one. Her nanny usually takes her."

"Ah, yes, I remember." He turned his head and kissed her hand. "Would you like me to take him there?"

"Would you? I'm meeting up with Aram."

"Of course. Can we trust that woman or should I take Dembe with me?"

"Ray," she exclaimed, slapping his shoulder. "You will not take Dembe with you on our son's play date."

He shrugged and kissed her softly. "I'll get him ready then."

"Thank you, honey. I'll write the address down for you."

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"Oh, hello, Tony," Laura greeted with a smile. "And…"

"Raymond," he offered.

"Nice to meet you! Come in, boys! Catie is waiting already."

The kids were playing in the sandbox in the backyard, while Laura and Red were watching them, talking about this and that over a cup of coffee and cold beverages.

The woman kept making mooneyes at him and it was slightly unnerving by now. Thankfully the little ones were wobbling over to them.

"Mommy, To-ny gimme," she said, holding out a bunch of flowers and grass.

"Awww, that's so sweet of you, Tony," Laura said and Red couldn't help but grin at his little boy. "Did you thank him?"

"Thanks!"

Tony smiled widely and then pressed a kiss to his friend's cheek, both kids laughing now.

"He sure is a charmer."

"That he is."

While the kids were playing again, Laura continued flirting with him, not that he ever engaged in that flirtation. She was starting to go on his nerves. Next time Lizzie would have to go with Tony. He was ripped out of his thoughts, when a cold wetness hit his crotch. He jumped up and pulled at the wet trousers so they wouldn't touch his skin. Laura was at his side immediately.

"Oh gosh, I'm sorry. I'm such a klutz." She started patting him down with a towel and Red had to grip her wrist to stop her from touching a part that wasn't for her to touch.

"Hey, there."

Red turned at the voice of Lizzie and watched as she came through the gate. Her eyes narrowed at the sight of another woman touching her man's pants. He knew that look. She wasn't happy, not at all. "Lizzie."

"Mama!" Tony was already storming up to her as quickly as he could and she picked him up and hugged him, before putting him down again.

"Wait here for Mommy, okay, sweetheart?" The little boy nodded and stayed put, as his mother walked back to the woman.

"Lizzie."

"I don't know who gave you the right to fondle my husband while your child is on a play date with ours."

"Lizzie," Red tried to interrupt again.

"Don't ever, ever think about touching him ever again or I will cut off your hands." with that she turned around and started walking back from where she had come from, picking up her son on the way.

"Lizzie. Sweetheart, wait." He sighed. "Damn."

"Husband?"

Red's shoulders slumped and he turned his head to the woman. "What?" The wetness between his legs was growing uncomfortable.

"She's your wife." He looked at her, a frown on his face. "You two are…"

"We're a couple, yes."

"Oh! Oh… I'm sorry, I didn't…" He shook his head and started walking towards the gate. "I can call her and explain."

"There's nothing to explain. Thank you."

She was waiting in the car for him, when he left the backyard. At least she hadn't left him stranded, because he wasn't sure if Dembe would have picked him up later either. Even though his long time friend was driving the car, he knew that he was only still there because Lizzie had told him to.

The ride back to the house was filled with an uncomfortable silence; Liz wasn't even looking in his direction. When they exited the car, she took their son up to his room, to put him down for a nap, while Red went to change his pants. From the bedroom he could hear Dembe's voice asking Liz if she wanted him to stay. He couldn't quite make out what she replied, but then his best friend made his way past him and Red grabbed his arm.

"I'm glad that you're taking care of her, but I assure you I didn't do anything."

"And still she is hurting."

"Yeah…" He ran a hand over his hair. "I'll make it right again. Thank you, my brother."

Dembe patted his shoulder. "I love you, Raymond, but don't think I wouldn't hurt you if you ruined this."

"I wouldn't expect anything else." The two men nodded at each other and Red decided to get ready for the discussion that would surely come now.

Only minutes later he heard her coming down the stairs and straightened on the couch. She didn't look at him. "Lizzie."

"What are you still doing here, Reddington?"

Ouch. She knew that he hated it when she called him by his last name. "Are you throwing me out?"

"Wouldn't you rather be somewhere else?"

"Stop."

"Or should I say with someone else?"

"Enough," he told her in a stern voice.

She shook her head as she grabbed the bottle of water and then made her way out of the kitchen. "Yes, enough, Reddington. I'm sick of these games."

He was up and at her side in a matter of seconds and boxed her in against the wall, watching how she balled her hands to fists. If he wasn't treading carefully now, he'd surely feel it soon enough. "I suggest you stop this childish behavior, Elizabeth, before you embarrass yourself any further." He could feel her tensing and for a second he wondered if she would bring her knee up between his legs. "Your assumptions are ridiculous."

"Let me go," she said between clenched teeth.

"I will never let you go," he told her immediately. "Can I explain what really happened, instead of letting you run around with the most ridiculous idea for what you think you've witnessed?"

She didn't reply, which he took as a good sign.

"First of all, I do not engage in any kind of flirtation with anyone outside of this relationship. What happened is that she threw her drink over my pants. Before I fully realized what had happened, she was already wiping that towel over me. That is what happened. And nothing more. From my side anyway." He sighed and his gaze softened. "When you left she was confused. She didn't know about us." Liz stayed silent and Red nodded to himself, before pushing off the wall. "If you want me to leave, I will respect your wish, though very unhappily, but don't take our son away from me."

"Is it true?"

"I've never lied to you."

They stood in silence for a couple of moments, before she reached out a hand and touched his waist. "I'm scared of losing you."

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her against him. "Elizabeth, I will never voluntarily leave you. I'm yours. For as long as you'll have me."

Liz put her head to his shoulder and sighed. "I'm sorry, Ray… I just… I don't know… with everything that's happened, I'm just so scared."

"What can I do? I'll do everything for you."

"I know," she said softly.

"Name it and I'll do it."

"Kiss me?"

Red grinned widely as he pulled his head back to look down at her. "With pleasure."

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"You know, I was thinking," he started, covering their bodies with the blankets and wrapping an arm around her. He loved making up with his Lizzie.

"About what?"

"We don't nearly have enough pictures of Tony." Liz started to laugh. They both knew just how many pictures have been taken already. "Of all of us."

She gently pressed her lips to his chest. "What did you have in mind?"

"A photo shoot."

"A photo shoot?"

"Yes, you know, one of these fancy studios, where we take a couple of clothing choices and they take family pictures."

Her heart swelled at his mention of family, she was sure it was only a matter of seconds until it burst through her chest. "You know, I think that's a wonderful idea." Snuggling closer to him, Liz rubbed her cheek against his skin. "I love you, Ray."

He hummed and buried his nose in her hair. "I love you."

Liz fell asleep shortly after, but Red couldn't. He didn't know how many hours had passed since then, but he was absolutely unable to shut off his mind. She had called him her husband. Was it simply because she had felt threatened? Possessive? Or was it actually the case that she wanted this, a marriage, with him. It wasn't that he had never imagined this, he had. His Lizzie would look absolutely perfect in her snow white wedding gown. They would marry somewhere in Italy, maybe Venice, where they would stay at their own apartment, with a balcony that had the most beautiful view. He could see it all, their little boy in a tux, Dembe as his best man, maybe Aram at her side. He imagined that either Lizzie wouldn't want anyone to give her away, because only Sam was supposed to do that, or if she actually preferred someone to do so, maybe Harold.

His heart was beating faster the longer he kept thinking about it. God, how much he loved her, wanted her… the thought of her carrying his last name was almost his undoing. But did she really want that? Maybe she hadn't thought about it when saying that, or maybe she really was just angry. He couldn't be sure either way.

As if sensing his inner turmoil, Liz made the most adorable snuffling noise and pulled herself impossibly closer to him, nuzzling her nose against the underside of his chin.

"I love you, Elizabeth," he whispered softly, before eventually drifting off to sleep himself.

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The next day they decided to finally go to the zoo. Liz felt bad for putting it off for so long already anyway. While Red dressed their little one, he was such a good father, it made her feel all fuzzy inside; Liz prepared a small bag that they could take with them.

She was positively surprised to see her man walking down the stairs in a polo shirt and a pair of jeans. They were snug in all the right places and she unconsciously licked her lips.

"But I'm the insatiable one," Red said with a grin.

Instead of feeling embarrassed at having been caught, she walked up to the pair and stuffed her hand in one of Red's back pockets, enjoying how his eyelashes fluttered. "And I thought you were irresistible in suits."

He growled low in his throat and turned his head to capture her lips with his. "We need to go, Lizzie," he said with a slight tremor in his voice. "The little one's all excited and I got a surprise waiting for us as well."

"A surprise?"

He just smiled at her in response. "Are you ready to go now?"

She hurried over to the couch and got the bag, before going back to his side, wrapping an arm around him and leaning in to plant a kiss on her son's cheek. "Ready."

Once at the zoo, they family of three was led through the entrance, were Liz noticed a sign.

"The zoo is closed today? Ray?"

He looked innocently at her. "What?"

"You can't just close a zoo."

"I didn't," he replied and she glared at him. "I paid the Smithsonian to close it for today."

"Raymond!"

"Sweetheart, I absolutely hate waiting. And it's not as if this hurts someone. Now, where to first, Tony-tots? Which animal do you wanna see?" The boy was looking around with big, round eyes, absolutely excited. Too excited to actually decide where to start. "How about we start with the monkeys, mh?"

"Ya!"

Once they got there, one of the zoo keepers led them into the open-air enclosure and towards a group of chimpanzees. The enclosure was huge, with trees and rocks and swings everywhere. Tony was already bouncing up and down, never had he been this close to the animals. Red put him down, but held onto his little hand. "Not so fast, little one. We can touch them soon, I promise."

"We can touch them?" Liz asked, her own eyes full with excitement. Mother and son were so alike.

"Why, of course."

The friendly zoo keeper held his hand out to Tony and as soon as the kid had gotten a nod from his father, he had stepped closer to the man. The baby chimp was as curious as the human one and both reached out to touch each other at the same time. Soon the mother of said baby chimp crept closer and protectively laid her arm around Tony.

"This is amazing," Liz whispered, more to herself than anything and sat down next to her son, holding out a hand towards the adult chimp. She took it and held it for a moment, before steering it to her own baby's head, allowing Liz to touch the small chimp.

Red smiled and handed the zookeeper the camera. He had the whole zoo at his service today, for whatever they wanted and he knew his Lizzie was enjoying this, not to speak of their son. He sat down as well, close to another chimp and held out both hands, palms up, watching with amazement, when the animal reached out and held onto his. Before he knew it, he had the bundle of black fur on his lap and long arms wrapped themselves around his back. He chuckled softly and carefully wrapped his own arms around it, stroking over its back.

"Already a new woman in your arms?" Liz joked.

"Actually, it's a male," the zookeeper told them and they laughed.

"Your charm works on everyone, I guess."

"Ma-ma, mompee!" Tony grinned as he hugged his new friend, just like his father did.

Liz smiled at the pair. "I know, baby, a monkey." She looked over to Red and had to do a double-take. Both, the animal and the man, were pursing their lips in what looked like a kissie mouth. "Ray?"

"Mhm?" He whipped his head around and looked at her.

"What are you doing?" She asked with a laugh, watching the chimp on her man's lap, smooching his cheek, before hugging him again.

"Making friends." He shrugged.

"Would you like to take a normal picture? All together?" The zookeeper asked them.

Liz shot Red a look. "What? I can't have carefree photos of you? That would be great, Jeff, thank you."

The three of them sat down, together with their newfound friends and smiled for the camera. After saying goodbye to the monkeys, Tony was more than a little reluctant, they moved on.

"How about tigers now, Tony-tots?" Red asked, bouncing him up and down.

"Mompee!"

He kissed his son's little head. "That was fun, mh? But what about those tigers now?"

"No! Mompee!" He exclaimed, his arm stretched upwards.

For a moment Red wasn't sure what he meant, but then his eyes followed the little arm. "Oh, would you look at that."

Liz now, too, looked up and gasped. "Oh my god! What is it doing up there? How did it escape?! Oh, no, it's gonna fall and hurt itself."

"Mhm."

"Mhm?! Ray, do something! It's going to get hurt!"

"I doubt it would jump into my arms," he said.

"Raymond! It could get killed. We need to find someone to help it." She was looking around frantically, when she noticed how Red was trying very hard, unsuccessfully, to hide his chuckle. "What?"

Finally the grin spread over his face. "Sweetheart, this thing is called 'the o-line'. It's been build especially for orangs so they can move freely between two of their resting places. It's basically an orangorail. I thought you've been here before," he said with a wink.

The smack to his arm wasn't a big surprise. "God damn it, Ray! Don't do that!"

He chuckled as he grabbed her arm and pulled her to him. "I'm sorry, sweetheart," he said, but she knew that he didn't really mean it. Before she could complain though, his lips had covered hers. The kiss made her relax immediately and she opened her mouth to welcome his tongue as her fingers curled into the fabric of his shirt.

"Da-da!" Tony exclaimed in an unamused tone, pulling on his father's collar.

The couple parted with a smack and Red licked his lips, before turning his head to his son. "What?" The little boy just frowned at him. "You'll understand soon enough that girls don't actually have cooties."

Liz watched the two of them, amazed at how alike they were. Where their son had picked up the famous Reddington glare, she didn't know, but it was awfully cute.

He poked Tony in his little belly, eliciting a giggle. "Alright, off to the tigers we go." He blindly reached back one hand, trusting that she would take it and of course she did.

The family of three walked over to another zoo keeper that led them through a backdoor. "Why don't you sit down there and I'll get the tiger?"

Red nodded and made to sit down, when he noticed Liz staring at him. "What?"

"A tiger? Here? Now? Raymond!"

Red grinned smugly up at her. "Aren't you a momma bear? Isn't she, Tony-tots?"

"Raymond," she said in a warning tone.

"Lizzie, do you really think I would throw the little one into a pit of tigers?" Just as he had finished saying that, the zoo keeper came back, holding a tiger cub in his arms and the FBI agent made a noise that was definitely not human.

"Sit down, ma'am and I'll put him on your lap," he said.

She complied immediately and true to his words, the man put the cub on her lap. "Oh god, look at him."

Red smiled lovingly at her. She was adorable when she got excited. "Alright, buddy, hold out your hand like this and let the kitty sniff before you touch him."

Their kid did as he was told and waited until the cub licked his little fingers. Tony giggled softly and then proceeded to gently touch the soft fur. The tiger was thoroughly enjoying being patted and scratched and snuggled even closer. They took a couple of pictures, before deciding to move on. There was still so much to see. This time it was Liz who had a hard time saying goodbye.

When they got to the Fennec Foxes, Tony sat down on the red sand and patiently waited for the animals to come closer. After one dared to sniff on the kid, the others followed swiftly and soon enough the baby was rolling around on the ground, while the small foxes licked his face. It was the cutest scene and Red couldn't help but film it.

After getting their, now more than a little dirty, son to the tortoises and then the crocodiles, they circled back and watched the meerkats. Tony was enjoying himself thoroughly, giggling away as the animals stood to attention, turning their little heads from left to right.

Once back home, Tony was somewhat tired after the eventful day he had had and his head rested on his daddy's shoulder.

"I'll just run to the store and get some groceries," Liz said, her fingers gently stroking through her baby's silky hair.

"Alright. Take Dembe with you."

"Ray, who would I need protection from? The cashier?"

He raised an eyebrow at her. "I meant to help you carry the bags, sweetheart."

"Oh… but I wouldn't want to call him over for that. I'm sure he's got better things to do."

"Lizzie."

"Fine," she caved. "I'll call him. Can you get Tony bathed and ready for bed?"

"Of course." He watched as the mother kissed the baby's nose, before leaning up to give him a quick kiss as well.

"I'll be back soon. I love you."

"I love you," Red immediately replied as he watched her go and started walking up the stairs. "Alright Tony," he started, sitting the kid down. "I'm going to draw you a bath, why don't you go find a book for later?"

He made sure that the water was neither too hot nor too cold and put some of the baby's soap in to make bubbles, knowing how much Tony loved bubble baths. He found a new diaper and a clean sleep suit. It was dark blue with grey sleeves and had 'daddy is my hero' in bright red letters on the front. Liz had found it and just had to buy it, knowing that Red would love it. He walked out of bathroom and saw his son sitting on the floor.

"Alright, kiddo, come here, let's get you cleaned up, you little grub." The kid just looked at him. "Tony, come here." Not a muscle was moved. "Tony. Come over here. Tub time."

"No."

That really seemed to be his favorite word.

"Tony, please come here now. We'll get you all cleaned up while you can play with your toys."

"No!"

Refusing to back away, Red crouched down so they were on eye level and looked at the baby. "Anthony, I'll count to three. If you don't come here before I'm finished counting, and I'll have to come over there, there will be no toys while you bathe." The baby just glared at him. "There won't be a bedtime story either. So come here now."

"NO!" Tony screamed, his little face all flushed already.

"One," he started, holding up a finger. "Two." Still there was no movement. "Three. Alright, Anthony, you had your chance." He got up and made his way over to the baby. Before he could even pick him up, Tony let himself fall to the floor and started crying. Red sighed and lifted him, but that only made the boy cry harder. "I don't know why you're being so fussy now."

A loud sob tore from the little throat and it physically hurt Red's heart. "Da-daaa!" He wailed, while little spit bubbles were welling up in his mouth. "Da-daaa! Woovoo!" He cried, as the tears ran down his chubby cheeks. He sat the little one on a changer and pulled his tiny shirt over his head. "Woovoo! Woovoo!"

"Tony, Tony, shhhh… hey, it's okay," Red tried to soothe as the baby continued sobbing. "Hey, shhh, sweetheart, it's alright, everything is alright." Picking him up once more, he cuddled him close, letting Tony sob into his shoulder. "I love you," he replied to another wave of 'woovoos'. "What's wrong, mh?" He pulled back a little to kiss Tony's forehead and watched as the kid rubbed at his cheek. "Ah, it's your teeth again, mh? I'm so sorry, little one. Let me take a look?" Ever so gently, Red parted the tiny mouth with his index finger to inspect the reddish gums. "It's about time they finally get here, so they won't bother you anymore." The kid looked absolutely devastated. "I'm sorry, Tootsie, but we'll have to clean you up real quick. Tell you what, you can still have your toys, okay? And I'll read you a story later as well."

Ridding the baby out of the rest of his clothes, he sat him into the warm water and put his rubber duck and the rest of his bathing toys in as well. Tony made no move to play with them though. He miserably looked up through heavy eyelashes, that still had tears clinging to them and Red winced at the sight. "I'll hurry, I promise." He grabbed the baby shampoo and poured some into his palm, while Tony put his thumb in his mouth and Red quickly, but gently washed him. When he was done rinsing the soft hair, he grabbed a fluffy towel he had warmed up and wrapped it around the small body. "There, all done. You're such a good boy."

Red dried and dressed him, before cuddling him close again. While balancing him on one hip, he got a bottle with formula ready and soon the two were on their way to the bedroom.

"Da-da…"

"Yes?" Tony pointed wordlessly to the master bedroom. "You wanna sleep with mommy and daddy?" The child nodded. "Of course, sweet boy. Let me just grab your plushy and a book."

Soon the two of them were cuddled up in the middle of the bed, with Tony resting against his father's chest as the older man softly read to him. Instead of his thumb, he was now suckling on his bottle, his eyes heavy as he emptied the last drops.

"I love you, Tony," Red whispered against his head.

One little hand found itself to Red's neck, where it gently grabbed onto the short hair. "Woovoo."


	11. Chapter 11

While Tony was downstairs playing with Dembe, Red was standing in front of the closet, looking for his favorite tie. He felt a little shove against his butt, so he turned and found Liz, lying on the bed, pretending to be innocent. She would always sit there and watch him get dressed, simply because she loved the fact that they were sharing a closet now, and of course because she loved to see him naked. He looked at her for a moment and then turned back to the closet. He felt the shove again a couple of seconds later and turned.

"Something I can help you with, Lizzie?"

"Mhm?"

He squinted at her, a smirk on his lips, and then resumed his search. Sure enough he was slightly shoved again. This time when he turned, he didn't just look at her. Instead he closed the gap between them and covered her body with his, taking care that his weight wouldn't crush her entirely. She started laughing when his mouth attached itself to her neck , while his hands went exploring.

"Ray!"

He took her wrists in one large hand and brought them up to rest above her head, holding them there. She bucked up and into him then, shooting him a toothy grin. Someone was feeling playful, alright. His free hand tugged at her tanktop, pulling it up and exposing a couple of inches of her smooth skin. Growling low in his throat, Red leaned down and nibbled on the supple flesh, eliciting a moan. Soon pinning down her hands was forgotten and he used his other hand to hold her to him as he kissed upwards until he reached her full lips. He took a moment to gaze lovingly down at her and then leaned in for a kiss, feeling her arms and legs closing around him.

"No!"

Their lips parted with a smack and both turned her heads to look at the intruder. "No? I'm saying 'yes'!" Red replied and kissed her once more.

"No!"

Liz had to suppress a laugh at the glare on their little boy's face. She really shouldn't be surprised that the kid could glare like that already. She watched as Tony pulled himself onto the bed and how Red's hand hovered closeby in case he fell. Soon enough, the child was kneeling next to them on the mattress, having, once again, a staring contest with his father. Red humored him for a moment and then poked him in the stomach, making him fall backwards. Tony started giggling and squirming under his father's hands and Liz couldn't remember ever feeling so at peace, as she watched her two men playing together. The older man pulled up the baby's shirt and blew bubbles on his belly, which resulted in a squeaking baby.

"We're gonna take pictures today, huh?" He asked, after both had caught their breaths. Tony smiled and nodded excitedly. Struggling to sit up, the little boy gladly grabbed onto his father, who pulled him into a sitting position and a received a kiss as a reward. Then he carefully slid off the mattress and wobbled towards the door. "Careful with the stairs, buddy," Red called after him.

"I got him, Raymond," Dembe replied.

"Thank you, my brother." He turned his head and looked down at the woman underneath him. She was looking up at him with a fond expression on her face. "I love you," he told her and gently kissed her one more time, before climbing off the bed as well. "You need to stop distracting me or we'll never get to the shoot in time."

She shrugged, even though he couldn't see it. "What can I say? You've got a nice butt," she told him and Red chuckled in response.

When they got to the studio, the photographer asked them to first choose a formal attire as they had told him already what kind of photos they would like. Red took their little boy with them to change while Liz was getting ready by herself. "Sweetheart, are you ready?" He called out after some time.

"One sec."

"The little one is coming to fetch you now." He crouched down next to his son and pointed to where Liz was. "Do you want to get mommy?" Tony nodded, all smiles. "She's right over there, can you see her legs? Go get her."

Little legs were quickly making their way towards the curtain. "Oh my god! Red! You got him a fedora? You look so cute, my sweet, sweet baby boy." The two of them emerged from the dressing room.

His Lizzie looked stunning in her red dress. He would always buy her clothes in that certain color. She was made for red. Both for him and the color. "You look breathtaking, my love," he said, kissing her softly. Reaching up, he adjusted the brim of his little boy's fedora and checked him under the chin.

"When did you get him the fedora?"

"Oh, a while ago. Actually, it was when you found that three-piece for him."

"You never said anything!"

He winked at her. "I wanted to surprise you."

They took lots of photos in several different positions and clothes and little Tony loved getting all the attention. He was smiling and behaving without ever becoming fussy. At the end of the shooting, Tony refused to let go of the fedora though, his daddy was wearing one all the time after all. He looked way too adorable anyway. The photographer promised to have their very own disc ready the next day and so the family decided to get some ice cream on their way home.

"Oh, honey, I almost forgot. I'm supposed to meet Aram."

"Okay, do you want us to wait?"

Taking a look at her little one, she decided against that. "Why don't you get him some ice cream and I'll meet you at home?" Without waiting for a reply, she leaned forward and touched Dembe's arm. "Would you mind picking me up later?"

"Of course not. Just call me."

"Wonderful. Thank you." She gave her son a kiss and gently pinched his cheek. "Daddy's going to buy you some ice cream, sweetheart. I'll come home in a bit, okay?" Tony nodded, already excited for the ice cream.

Red cupped her face in his hands and pulled her in for a kiss. "I love you."

Liz smiled widely and leaned in for another kiss. "I love you more. Later, boys!"

LizzingtonLizzingtonLizzington

Father and son were curled up on the couch with a book. Red was reading his boy 'Little Dorrit' by Charles Dickens. His deep, soft voice almost lulling the kid into sleep.

"I'm home!" They heard coming from the front hall and Tony straightened up.

"Ma-ma!" He called out, bouncing back and forth.

"Hey, you two," Liz greeted, walking towards the couch to greet her men. "Did Daddy get you ice cream?"

"Ya!" The little blond exclaimed with a big grin.

She smiled at the boy and stroked through his hair. "I have a surprise, Tony." His eyes grew at the word. "Don't be mad," she whispered to Red and walked back to the front hall. Even before she had returned, Red heard exactly what the sound was.

"Meow." It came from Liz's arms. Before his little one could jump from the couch and hurt himself, Red carefully settled him on the floor. Liz was already sitting down as well, putting the small kitten on the floor. He was grey with black stripes all over. He had blue-greenish eyes just like their son and the most adorable little nose. The funny thing was that it looked like he had an 'M' on his furry forehead.

"Careful, Tony, he's a baby, just like you." Their boy was such a smart little fella. He sat down in front of the cat and patiently held out his hand, letting the kitten smell him. It wasn't long until it butted its head against the tiny fingers, eliciting a soft giggle. The cat was purring away as he curled up against Tony's leg, letting the baby stroke his fur. "He needs a name, baby boy. What's his name?"

Even though he wasn't really talking yet, Tony knew how to make his parents understand what he wanted. At least most of the time. "Meeb!" Liz looked puzzled. "Meeb!"

"Meagles? You want to call him Mr. Meagles, Tony-tots?" Red asked and the boy nodded eagerly. He held up a book. "We just read 'Little Dorrit'." He put the book on the coffee table and walked over towards the pair.

"Are you mad?" Liz asked softly.

He shook his head and lowered himself to the ground, before leaning in for a kiss. Then he gently scratched the cat's head. "Hello there, Mr. Meagles." In response, the small pet licked his hand, purring away. "So, we have a cat now," he stated matter of factly, and Liz smiled at him. Tony turned onto his belly, stretching out next to his new friend, and placed a kiss into his grey fur. Meagles turned his head and licked the kid's forehead, before rubbing against him and their son giggled again. "We have a cat," Red said again, shooting a smile at the woman he loved so much.

They got everything ready for the kitten and showed him where his litterbox was as well as his food and water bowls. Liz had apparently thought of everything. Of course Tony wanted to have his little friend with him when he went to sleep, so they humored him and put Meagles into his baby bed. If he needed to pee or drink or anything in the middle of the night, he could just leave through the wooden bars. At the moment both babies looked way too comfortable curled up next to each other. Tony didn't even want a story.

"So, when exactly did you plan all this?" Red asked, upon crawling into bed.

Liz shrugged. "I saw him with the animals at the zoo and figured that he would love that. Dogs are a big responsibility and with the work we do… I wouldn't want him to go through what Hudson had to go through. A cat seemed safe." He nodded and pulled the blankets over them, but remained quiet. "Are you sure you're not mad? Should I have asked you before?"

"Sweetheart, stop worrying," he smiled and pulled her closer. "Feel free to make it up to me, if you think I'm mad, though." He waggled his eyebrows, making her laugh.

"You have a filthy mind."

"Mhm… and you love it." He didn't wait for her reply as he covered her mouth with his.


	12. Chapter 12

"Lizzie?" He called out. Instead of the beautiful brunette, a ball of fur came to greet him. "Hello, Meagles." He scratched the kitten behind the ear for a moment. "Lizzie!"

"Kitchen," she called back.

"Sweetheart, I have the pictures!" He said, his voice fully of excitement. "Dembe is getting some frames. Come look at them!" Red almost ran into his son as he entered the living room. He quickly lifted him into his arms, receiving a welcome kiss from the little kid. "How's my sweet boy? Wanna look at pictures? Come, let's sit on the couch. Lizzie!"

"I'm coming, geez." She sat down next to her man, who apparently didn't even have time for a kiss, so she just pulled his face to her and kissed his cheek.

"I'm sorry. I'm just excited for these," he said with a boyish smile, before he finally leaned in to touch her lips with his. "Hi."

"Hi, yourself. Now show me what you've got." She sat Tony on her lap, while Red took out some photos. "Oh god, these are beautiful." Some of the shots had been taken without either of them noticing, and those were among her favorites. Seeing another folder she pointed at it. "What's that?"

He grinned widely at her. "I got some of them in a smaller size so I can put them in my wallet."

Liz leaned in to kiss his cheek again, "You're the most adorable human being ever."

"I'd argue that's him," He pointed at their son, "but, but I will accept any and all of your praise." He couldn't help the feeling of pride inside his chest.

They looked through the pictures and Tony clapped his little hands in excitement. "Oh, I love that one too, little man."

"Oh, come on," Liz complained.

It was a shot of her alone, wearing the red dress. She was looking off to the side and wore a carefree smile. She had probably been watching Red and Tony at that moment.

"This is going on my nightstand," he told her, licking his lips. "God, I love you." He looked from the picture in his hands to her, his pupils slightly dilated.

"I love you more."

"I doubt that's possible," he said.

"Very much possible," she countered and kissed him to shut him up.

LizzingtonLizzingtonLizzington

After another long day at the post office, Liz wanted nothing more than to curl up on the couch, preferably with her two men. And their cat. Mostly because wherever Tony went, Meagles followed; the two would always stick together.

When she opened the front door she was met by silence. There was no baby running as fast as his little legs could carry him, trailed by a ball of fluff, accompanied by a deep voice remindinged them not to run in the house. It was just… quiet.

"Raymond?" She called out, hand at her hip, in case she needed her gun. Meagles had arrived and was rubbing his head against her legs now.

"In here, sweetheart."

She sighed in relief and bent down to pet him. "Why are the lights out?" She came to a stop at the doorframe. The dining room table held candles and what looked like a self cooked meal, as well as glasses filled with wine. Rose petals were strewn everywhere. She was speechless.

"You're breathtaking, sweetheart," his voice pulled him out of her thoughts. Red was standing in front of her, looking dapper as always. He cupped her face in warm palms and pulled her in for a kiss. "I hope you're hungry."

She nodded and let him pull her along. "Where's Tony?"

"With Ressler. Dembe took him there. He's staying the night over. We'll meet them for lunch tomorrow. Tonight you're all mine." He pulled out a chair for her and waited until she was seated and swept her hair from her neck, placing a soft kiss on the exposed skin.

"Did you do all this?" She asked with a smile.

"Why, of course."

"Not that I'm complaining, because this is incredible, but why?"

"It's our anniversary."

"No, it isn't."

"But it is," he replied. "Today, five years ago, you walked down the stairs of the Post Office for the very first time. Facing an intimidating, but chained animal without any fear."

She took his hand in hers and squeezed. "I knew even back then, that you were just a big softy."

He chuckled. "I must admit that our relationship actually started a couple of days later… when you punctured my carotid with a pen. Your passion was very… arousing." He lifted her hand and touched his lips to her knuckles. "And now we're here with the most adorable little son."

Liz let go of his hands and placed hers at the back of his neck, pulling him in for a long kiss. "I love you," she said when they pulled apart.

"I love you. Happy anniversary, Lizzie."

"Happy anniversary, Ray," she replied, blinking away tears.

He lifted the domes off their plates and put them aside. "Dig in, sweetheart. I hope you like it."

"You know I will. It's my favorite after all." He just winked at her in return.

Dinner was spent with easy conversation, stolen bites and kisses in between. She was enjoying this night thoroughly; loving having his undivided attention.

"Lizzie?"

"Mhm?"

"There's desert, but I'd like to say something first."

"You're not getting my share."

He smiled at that, again taking her hand in his. She could feel it shaking slightly. "I love you so much. You're everything to me; you and Tony. It's the most incredible gift I have ever received. Not a day goes by where I take your love for granted. You gave me a second chance… and a third. And I know I'm not deserving of your love, but it feels so right, so good." She was quietly sitting there, listening to his every word and trying not to cry. He was the most amazing man she had ever met. "I promise you I will always love you and our child. I will protect you and take care of you. I will always do my damnedest to make sure you'll always be happy. You've made me become less hideous, my ray of light. You gave me love, a family. And I will love you until the end of my days." From the pocket of his jacket, he took out a small box. Flipping the lid open, he kneeled down and showed it to her, not letting go of her hand. "Elizabeth… my Lizzie… will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?"

Time stood still and neither moved a muscle. Red was nervous, fearful even. He could barely breathe and his heart was banging furiously in his chest. What if she said no? Maybe she didn't want to marry him after all? He had screwed it up. All of it. Their relationship would end as well. He didn't want to lose her; he couldn't lose her now.

Before he could even open his mouth again, he found himself in a choking hug. The force of the impact threw him off balance, causing both of them to fall to the floor. He had barely held onto the ring.

Chuckling gently, he closed his arms around her. "Is that a yes?"

"Yes!" She exclaimed immediately. "Yes! Yes! Yes! God, Ray, yes. I want nothing more!"

Tension left his body and he fully relaxed under her. He pressed a kiss to her hair and set the box aside. "Let me look at you, sweetheart." She pulled her head back and he could see the tears in her eyes. "I love you. I love you so much."

"I love you too, Ray."

He hauled himself into a sitting position, leaving her on his lap. Taking the ring out of the box, he looked into her eyes, waiting until she had nodded. The ecstatic grin on her face was brighter than he had ever seen. He had done this, he had made her this happy. It felt incredible. He gently pushed the ring onto her finger and kissed it.

She cupped his face in her hands, pulling his lips up to hers. "You're shaking," she whispered.

"I was worried for a moment," he admitted.

"How could I not want to marry the love of my life?" She asked, hugging him to her again.

Fueled with passion for his soon-to-be-wife, Red turned his head and found her lips with his, pushing his tongue into her mouth to tangle with hers. She tasted so unbelievably good. She would be the death of him one day.

Desert would have to wait… or maybe not.

LizzingtonLizzingtonLizzington

He woke up to a wet nose being pushed into his cheek and was momentarily confused. It took him a moment to realize that Meagles was probably wondering where his friend was. He scratched the cat behind the ear and encouraged him to settle down on the mattress. Turning his head, Red buried his nose in a mop of brown hair. She was nestled against him from head to toe, her leg thrown over his and her hand resting on his chest, just above his heart.

The sun shining through the slightly open curtain, made her ring sparkle brilliantly. He had asked her to marry him. She had agreed to become his wife. He felt as if he could move mountains, her love giving him the strength. She was incredible and he loved her so much. Thinking back to how he had actually freaked out in the car when he and Dembe had arrived at the jeweler, made him chuckle. Once his friend had gotten him inside, it had gotten even worse. He couldn't remember a time when he had been that nervous.

The ring was vintage style. The white gold band was simple in shape but held dozens of small diamonds. Another larger diamond sat in the middle. He hadn't cared about the price. His Lizzie deserved the best in life. She had yet to see the engravement though.

"I can hear you thinking," she said, her voice still heavily laced with sleep.

He pressed his lips against her head and pulled her closer. "I'm just amazed that you're going to be my wife. All mine, forever."

"Aren't we possessive," she joked, her fingers slowly stroking through his chest hair.

"You know I am."

Her fingers trailed over his belly and down his happy trail, vanishing under the blankets. He hissed, the muscles in his legs tightening. "So, this is all mine then." Red could barely keep his hips from bucking uncontrollably. Somehow she had made his libido even more active. Liz squeezed a little more. "This is all for me."

"Yes," he breathed out. "Yours always. God… Lizzie."

She kissed his chest and then looked up at him, not stopping the movement of her hand. "Did we have a good dream? Someone apparently was awake before I had even touched him."

"I get rock hard just thinking about you," he moaned. Her hand on its own was incredible, but the added contact of the ring gently scratching over him was almost killing him.

She caressed him for a while, enjoying how his head was pressed in the pillow, his eyes shut tightly and his lips parted. With a kiss to his cheek, she let go of him. "I'm starving. Meet you downstairs?"

His eyes popped open and he grabbed her before she could even move away from him. Pushing her into the mattress, he was quick to cover her body with his. "Oh, no, you don't." His scorching hot hardness was pressing insistently against her lower abdomen. "Teasing me like that and then running off is not an option."

"But I'm hungry," she protested.

"Oh, I'll feed you. I'll feed you alright." His voice was deep, rumbling through her body and making her squirm beneath him. He was watching her closely, as his fingers started to tease her.

"Ray," she moaned.

"That's more like it. Do you want this?" He asked, rocking against her. She nodded quickly, rotating her hips for more friction, but he pulled his fingers away and pinched the inside of her thigh instead. "What was that?"

"Yes. I want you. I want you so much."

He quickly covered her lips with his, kissing her deeply, while his fingers continued teasing her. She moaned into his mouth and he kissed over her neck, her clavicle, theand the valley between her breasts, scratching his morning stubble against her soft skin.

"Please, Ray, no more teasing."

His tongue came out to lap at the underside of her breast. "But you taste so good. I can't get enough of you. I'll never get enough of you."

"Raymond, I swear to god –" she broke off when he suddenly pushed into her. He didn't stop until he was fully buried inside her and both moaned loudly.

"You were saying?" He asked after catching his breath. Kissing his way back to her mouth, he nuzzled her nose with his. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too. I can't wait to marry you." He groaned at her words and picked up his pace.

According to the clock on her bedside table, they had roughly two hours to get ready for their lunch date and he was going to make the best of those two hours.


	13. Chapter 13

After a refreshing shower - during which Liz had repeatedly swatted Red's hands away, telling him to keep them to himself because she was too exhausted, but ended up letting him wash her hair and body though- the couple made their way to the park.

They were supposed to meet Ressler and their little son for a picnic. When they arrived, they were pleasantly surprised to find Aram there as well. Of course Tony spotted them immediately. He got to his little legs and started tottering towards them and Red bent down to pick him up.

"Ma-ma, da-da!"

Liz kissed her baby boy and stroked over his blond hair. "Hi, sweetie. Did you have a good time with Uncle Ressy?"

Tony nodded and then angled up his head to look at his dad, pursing his lips for another kiss. Of course, Red could never say no to that. "Hello, Tony-tots. I missed you so much."

"Hi, guys!" She greeted both men with a hug.

"Hey, Liz!" Aram greeted back. "You look great." Then he surprised the rest of them when he pulled Red in for a hug as well. "You do, too, uhm… Mr. Reddington, sir."

Red laughed and clapped the younger man on the shoulder, before sitting down. "You don't have to be so formal, Aram."

"Right… uhm… Raymond… uh… Red. Yes, Red." Everyone was looking at Aram and he blushed, immediately busying himself with setting the table.

Liz shook his head. "Well, guys, there's news to share," she said, shooting her man a quick look, to see if he was alright with that.

"Are you pregnant again?" Aram asked.

"What? No!" She exclaimed, but Red just snorted.

"I mean we do spend a lot of time in bed, but –" he broke off, when an elbow connected painfully with his side.

"Reddington!" He smiled sheepishly and placed a gentle hand on her thigh.

Ressler had his face in his hands, trying to block out the images in his head. "Alright, I don't think I'll ever be able to forget this. Can we please move on? But let's wait a moment. There's still someone missing."

"Who else is coming?" She asked.

"That would be us," came a deep voice behind them.

She shot around and saw her boss and other co-worker walking towards them. "Hey, guys," she greeted with a smile.

Cooper drew her into a quick hug and then shook Red's hand, before plucking Tony from his arms. "Hello there, little man."

"Toops!" Tony shouted out his version of the man's last name. Since everyone only called Harold that, the little boy didn't really know any better.

Upon greeting Samar, Red could see Liz stiffen slightly. When would she understand that he had no interest in the other women? He raised an eyebrow at her, watching how she blushed, obviously realizing that her jealousy was unwarranted.

Cooper sat down next to Aram, Tony still in his arms. "I heard something about news?"

"Yes," Liz said, a smile spreading over her lips, as she leaned against her man, who in turn was happy to wrap an arm around her.

"Are you expecting another child?" Samar asked and Ressler put his face in his hands once again.

"I believe we moved on from that," he said and everyone chuckled at his antics.

Liz looked up at Red, her eyes sparkling with happiness. "Do you want to tell them?"

"You go ahead," he replied, stroking his thumb over her side.

"We're getting married," she just blurted out. A short moment of silence followed before everyone reacted.

"What? That's amazing, Liz!" Aram said, the others joining him in congratulating them.

The animated chatter made Tony want to join in and soon he started bouncing up and down in Cooper's arms, blabbering along. The two-year old didn't really know what was going on, but everyone seemed happy. He looked around and caught his father's eyes, his grin widening.

"Daddy," he said, holding out his hands.

Red smiled back at his boy. "If you want to come here, you need to walk, Tony, no crawling over the table."

The kid nodded and looked up at Cooper. "Down."

"What's the special word, little one?" Red asked, giving him a look.

"Pwease." He was rewarded with a soft 'good boy' and then walked over to his father, as quickly as his little legs would carry him.

Lifting his son into his arms, he cuddled him close, kissing his chubby cheek. "Are you hungry, Tony-tots?"

"Ya!"

The group was having a nice picnic, filled with easy conversation. They even asked about Dembe's whereabouts and Red told them that he was spending some time with his own family. He marveled at how well they all got along, he had never thought that one day he, the Concierge of Crime, would sit through lunch at a table full of FBI agents. Then again, he was going to marry one himself. Sometimes he wondered if he was asleep, dreaming all of this.

"Daddy?" His little boy drew him out of his reverie.

"Mhm?"

"Pee."

"You gotta pee? Alright, let's go find a place. Sweetheart, we'll go find a bathroom or something."

"Alright," Liz replied, checking her boy under the chin, before watching them go.

"He's so good with him," Aram said, not able to keep the awe from his voice. Liz nodded, warmth spreading through her. "I never thought I'd live to see that. I mean of course I should have known he would be good with a child, because of his own daughter… I mean not that… uhm –" Ressler kicked him under the table and Aram broke off.

She tried to smile as the young man apologized silently, but on the inside she felt like screaming. She didn't know why. Red had had a life before her, she knew that, knew that he had been married to Carla and that they had a daughter, but she also knew that after everything that had happened, whether she had all the information or not, he had no contact with them anymore. Liz was afraid of having him and then losing him for good. She knew what living without him was like and it was horrible.

She was so lost in thought, that she startled when Red sat back down next to her, letting Tony run around the table, demanding Ressler's attention.

"Are you okay?" He asked, having picked up on weird vibes.

She threw him a big grin, which didn't make him feel any better. "Sure."

Looping her arm around her back, he pulled her into his side, kissing her temple, hoping that maybe that would make her feel better.

"It's incredible that he tells you when he needs to go. My nice wouldn't do that until she was three. It was a pain," Aram said.

Red nodded. "He's such an easy child. Potty training him couldn't be easier."

"When are you guys getting married?" Samar asked.

He smiled softly. "Any day is fine with me."

"We haven't really talked about it yet," Liz told them.

"Were you going to get a wedding planner? A friend of mine is the best! I'll just write down his details for you, hold on." Aram frantically searched for something to write on after gladly accepting the pen Cooper held out to him.

Red took the offered piece of paper and put it inside his jacket pocket. "That is very nice of you, Aram, thank you."

Soon they were saying their goodbyes, again congratulating the couple before letting them leave. Tony seemed ready for a nap and Red gladly took him to his room, where the little boy fell asleep almost instantly.

He found his fiancée (he was absolutely psyched about that word), in the kitchen, nursing a glass of water. He still had the feeling something was off. "Lizzie?" She turned around and looked at him. "Are you sure you're okay? Something's going on."

"I'm fine," she replied, shooting him a quick smile.

"Elizabeth," he spoke her name in a low voice. "If you don't want this, you can just tell me."

She looked confused for a moment. "Don't want what?"

"To get married."

Even though he tried putting on a brave face, the look in his eyes almost broke her heart. "What? No! No, that's not - I… I do want to marry you." Liz hurried over to him, practically flinging herself against his chest.

"You see, yesterday I'd believe that to be true, this morning even, but something's changed. What happened between this morning and now?"

She cupped his face between her hands and gave him a hard kiss. "Don't say that, Red. I want to marry you. I really do. I just worry at times. It's not your fault, you're great… I just have issues."

"So, it is my fault. I left you and you think I'll do it again."

"No, I'm just worried that I'll drive you away somehow."

He gave her an incredulous look. "That wouldn't be possible in a million years, Lizzie. You're mine, and I'm yours. I love you Elizabeth, you have to realize and believe how much I do."

Nodding, she wrapped her arms more tightly around him, pushing her face into his neck. "I know. And I love you, too. Ignore me, it's just pre-wedding jitters or something."

Pressing a kiss to her head, he let his hands wander over her back. "You need to tell me those things, sweetheart. I can't reassure and comfort you if you don't tell me."

She pulled her head back and let her hands caress the back of his head. Nodding at his words, she pursed her lips and waited. Red chuckled and then leaned in to kiss her softly.

"Do you want to talk about wedding arrangements?" He asked upon pulling back. Her answering smile couldn't have been bigger.


	14. Chapter 14

A couple of months later they were invited to a dinner for people working with the FBI. The Reddington family was dressed to the nines, both men wearing tuxes, while Liz was wearing a beautiful red evening gown.

Since kids were welcome at the dinner, the couple hadn't bothered looking for someone to babysit, and soon enough little Tony had found someone to color with. Dembe was keeping an eye on him, so Red asked his fiancée for a dance.

He wrapped both arms around her waist, smiling when she wrapped her arms around his neck in response. "You look extra beautiful today, my love."

She blushed slightly at his words. "So you've told me."

"I can't help myself. I would never have imagined my life to become this perfect. The woman of my dreams and our little boy. I don't think it could get any better. I didn't even think I would ever sit through a dinner with a room full of law enforcement officers."

"Well, you did kind of save the world. You're a hero." He snorted at that.

"I'm no hero, Lizzie."

"You're my hero." She kissed him quickly to stop him from replying. "Now shush."

"As you wish, dear."

They continued swaying to the music, occasionally stealing a kiss here and there, making Red wish that they were in the privacy of their home. The things he wanted to do to this beautiful creature in his arms wasn't for anyone to see but them.

"You're thinking dirty things again," she said, breaking through his haze.

"I always am with you in my arms," he replied with a cheeky grin.

"Daddy?" Their boy was tugging at his father's pants, staring up at the two of them.

"Hey there, little man! Did you escape from your little girlfriend?" He nodded over at Dembe, telling him to stay put, before lifting his son in his arms.

"Wanna kissie!" The kid exclaimed with a look of horror on his face, making his parents laugh.

"You don't come after your father in that area then," Liz said with a wink.

"Mommy, pee."

She kissed his little head, whispering, "You're such a good boy."

"Pee," he said again.

"Will you take daddy with you, sweetie?" Tony nodded and looked at his father.

Red smiled at the boy. "Alright then, off we go. We'll meet you back at the table, sweetheart."

The two quickly made their way to the bathroom, where Red sat the kid down. "Me," Tony said.

"You wanna do this alone?" Lately their child wanted to be more independent. He would tell his parents that he needed to go, but he wanted to go alone most of the time. "Alright, take your time, okay?"

Red stood leaning against the sink, listening to his son babbling away, not sure what exactly he was talking about. Another man walked in and the two shared a smile. "How old?"

"Almost three now."

"Daddy?"

"Still here, Tony."

"You not listen tention!"

He had to swallow the laugh that was about to break free. "I am paying attention, I promise. Are you done?"

Some rustling was heard and then the toilet flushed loudly. "Done!"

"Good boy. Pull up your pants before you come out, alright?" He knew that his son loved running around, flashing off his little naked butt.

"'kay." Under the door, he could see his little feet shuffling around, pants around his ankles, before small fingers grabbed them, pulling them up. "Daddy?"

"Mhm?"

"Help, pwease."

"Come out then, Tony-tots." The kid wobbled over to him, holding his pants up and Red kneeled down to pull up the zipper and button it up. "There we go. Now let's wash your hands. Did you wipe, sweetie?"

"Ya."

"Such a good boy," he praised, picking him up so he could reach the sink. Together they washed and dried the kid's hands and then left the bathroom hand in hand.

"Hello, there handsome," a woman said, leaning against a wall and smiling gently at Tony. "Good evening."

Red smiled politely back at her. "Good evening, miss."

"Rhonda," she offered.

"Raymond," he introduced. "And Tony."

"He's adorable. How old is he?"

One day he would need to get used to people asking about his child, that didn't mean he particularly enjoyed it. "Almost three."

"He looks just like his daddy."

Somehow they came to talk about Madagascar, finding out that they had both spent some time in the island's busy capital, Antananarivo. Sharing numerous tales of what they had experienced caused both of them to eventually lose track of time, so when Red turned around and found himself looking into the furious face of his plus one. "Lizzie."

"It would be wonderful if you were responsible enough to look after your son instead of entertaining your primal instincts."

"He's right –" Red looked down, but his son was nowhere to be seen. Fear shot through him.

"Yeah, he's found his way back to me, after you let my three year old walk around alone!"

"I didn't – it was only a minute, that I –"

"Spare me," she said, storming off. He watched her say something to Dembe, before leaving through the front door.

"Wow, she's a vixen," the woman said and Red glared at her.

"No. What she is, is correct. Excuse me."

He hurried through the crowd of people, wanting to kick himself for not taking better care of his little son. Lizzie was staring out at the Potomac, shivering in her thin dress. "Sweetheart –"

"Don't. Just don't."

"Look, I'm sorry, okay? I didn't realize he had wandered off. The room was swarming with federal agents, he was perfectly safe."

"Yeah, well that's wonderful Reddington, he's still a child" she spat, and he cringed, hating it when she called him that.

He pushed his hands in his trousers, not knowing what to do with them. He wanted to give her his jacket, but he knew how thick headed she could be. "It's such base emotion, sweetheart."

Liz shot around. "This is not about jealousy!"

"Then what is it about? Because as far as I know, you saw me talking to some woman and immediately thought the worst."

"Because it's always the worst with you!"

The muscle under his eye twitched. "That's unfair and you know it."

"Of course, when I state the truth it's unfair, but when you try talking yourself into another woman's skirt, it's all just good fun."

"What are you talking about? I don't even remember her name!"

"That suits you just perfectly thought, doesn't it?!"

"For God's sake, Elizabeth! What the hell is your problem?!" He finally exploded. "Is it that time of the month already?"

He watched her pale slightly and immediately felt bad, but then anger crossed her features. "You're an asshole."

"Oh, so I'm the asshole again," he said and she turned away. "What is it this time?"

"Because I probably lost the baby!" She cried out, tears running down her cheeks.

They stayed perfectly still for long moments. "W-what did you say?" His heart was banging furiously inside his chest, but she didn't reply. "Elizabeth."

"I might've lost the baby," she said again, her voice shaking.

"I… I didn't… how…"

"I started bleeding," she hiccupped.

It was getting hard for him to breathe and he had to loosen the bowtie or he would suffocate. "When did you find out?"

"Two weeks ago."

"You've known you're pregnant for two weeks and you didn't tell me? I thought, that after all we've been through that you would be able trust me. If we're going to be getting married, we both need to be able to trust and communicate with each other. The child... is it mine?

She turned back towards him, looking absolutely heartbroken. "How can you say that?"

Tears were pooling in his own eyes. "Why didn't you tell me, Lizzie? Why? I deserve to know."

A loud sob ripped from her throat. "I had to be sure Ray! I was scared… w-when… w-with Tony… you-you…"

He couldn't take it anymore. Taking two long strides towards her, he gathered her in his arms, pulling her close enough to feel her heart against his chest. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart, I'm sorry."

"I should've t-told you."

"Yeah," he agreed softly. "But I do understand why you didn't. You won't believe how sorry I am, Lizzie. Sometimes I wish you hadn't put up with me. You deserve so much better."

"Please don't say that, Ray." He swallowed hard against the lump in his throat. "I love you."

"I love you too, sweetheart, so much." Pulling back, he gently wiped at her tears, before giving her a soft kiss.

"The blood… oh God, Ray, I couldn't breathe."

"I wish I could've been there for you, Lizzie," he said, nuzzling her nose with his. Then his hands slipped towards her stomach. "Have you seen a doctor?"

She sniffled. "He's seeing me tomorrow."

"Not good enough. We'll find someone right away."

"Ray, it's Sunday night", she tried to reason.

He shook his head. "I'll make some calls." He pulled her in for another kiss. "The baby's going be alright, Lizzie. Our baby is going to be just fine. Okay?"

What else could she do, but agree with him?

He quickly shrugged out of his jacket and wrapped it around her shaking form, wrapping an arm around her, before using his free hand to find his cell. "Dembe, I need you to call Victoria Flynn. Lizzie and I need to see her right away. Yes, as in tonight. Thank you, my friend." He hung up and pulled it head back to look her in the eyes, not saying anything.

They found themselves at the doctor's office only half an hour later and Liz was getting more nervous by the minute. Red was sitting next to where she was half lying and sitting on a chair, stroking her arm with one hand, while his free arm was wrapped around her shoulder.

"I should've told you. I'm sorry, that I didn't," she said quietly.

"We've been over this, Lizzie," he replied, kissing her cheek.

"I feel like the worst person in the world."

"Look at me," he said. "Look at me, Lizzie. You are the most wonderful person I have ever met and I don't ever want to hear you say differently." He leaned forward and captured her lips with his, showing her how special she was to him.

Someone cleared their throat. "Am I interrupting?"

Slowly the couple parted and Red turned towards the intruder. "Victoria, thank you for seeing us immediately."

"It was brought to my attention that this is an emergency and who am I to say no to Raymond Reddington? Who's this lovely lady?"

"This is my Elizabeth," he said with his voice full of adoration.

The FBI agent smiled slightly. "Hello, Doctor Flynn. Thank you for seeing me so quickly."

"Hello Elizabeth. It really is no problem. So, are congratulations in order?" The doctor sat down, watching Liz's face fall.

She bit her lip. "I'm not sure how far along I am, but… I… I started bleeding…"

"Alright, honey, say no more." The doctor started pulling on gloves, getting her machines ready. "It isn't uncommon for a woman to get vaginal bleeding or intermittent bleeding that seems like a regular period, so let's not get too worried just now." She gently pushed up Liz's dress and applied the gel. "Let's see what's going on here." Red tightened his arm around his fiancée's shoulders, trying to calm them both down. "See that little dot over there?" The couple nodded. "That's your little dot. And it's doing just fine."

Liz gasped, tears shooting to her eyes. "Our baby's okay?"

"There's nothing wrong with your baby," Victoria said with a grin. "Is this your first child?"

"Second," Red replied, unable to tear his gaze from the screen.

"Raymond Reddington, you've been busy! I'll just print a couple of these for you and then you're good to go. Elizabeth, I want you to check in with your OB/GYN if the bleeding lasts longer, though." She handed them the pictures and some paper towels and Red took it upon himself to make sure his fiancée's belly was free of the gel.

"We're going to have another baby," Liz said.

"And look how beautiful it is," Red replied, a gentle smile on his face.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know, I know. It's been ages since the last update and I'm sorry. I'm struggling with writing at the moment, it's a pain. I hope you'll like this chapter anyway. Thank you for sticking with this fic.

“Yes,” she said to herself, pumping her fist in the air.

It had been two months since their scare. Liz had stopped bleeding a week later, and she was now officially on vacation for two weeks. Red had tried to talk her into flying to some exotic island but she had other plans. Upon asking, he hadn’t been able to get any information out of her, which didn’t keep him from pestering her about it anyway, but she remained tightlipped.

“What are we celebrating?” Red asked, watching her from where he was standing in the doorway, Tony settled at his hip and their cat head-butting his legs.

She loved her little family and she was more than excited to add one more to it. Shooting him a smile, she stood and walked over to them, stroking her fingers through her son’s soft hair, before leaning in to kiss her soon-to-be husband.

“I just got the confirmation for our first family trip.” She grinned.

“So where are we going?”

“Nice try,” she replied, patting his cheek.

Red could barely keep in a frustrated groan. “Lizzie, at least tell me if we’re going to be needing the jet.”

She pondered that for a moment. “I guess we could drive.”

His eyes narrowed. “How long of a drive are we talking?”

“Mhm… about seven hours, I guess.”

“Seven hours?! Absolutely not. No.”

“No,” little Tony parroted.

She raised a brow at him. “Alright, so no road trip then,” she said, walking into the kitchen.

Red sat his boy down and followed her. “Sweetheart, you know how he gets in the car. One hour is already more than he can handle.”

“You’re right.” She shot him a quick smile, before turning back towards the fridge.

He came to a stop behind her, but refrained from touching her. “I can’t determine whether you’re mad at me or not.”

Looking at him, she could see that he was actually confused. She put her hands on his hips and pulled him close for another kiss. “I’m not mad. You’re right. Let’s take your jet then.”

“Our jet,” he corrected softly. “Where are we headed?”

“Massachusetts.”

“You’re serious,” he said, a surprised look on his face. “Lizzie, the jet can take us anywhere you want and you choose Massachusetts? For two weeks nonetheless?”

“Raymond,” she started, taking his hands in hers and he knew that she was going to say something important. “When I think about the last time I went up there… let’s say it’s not one of my fondest memories. And I just… I mean… with you…”

He let go of her hands to pull her into his chest. “Alright,” he agreed. “Say no more.”

“You know I love you, right?”

“Yes. And you know how much I love you?”

“I do,” she replied.

“Well, I won’t have to worry about you knowing the correct answer when the priest asks you if you want to marry this old guy.” He grinned down at her.

“Why would I want to marry a priest?”

“Cheeky,” he said, before picking her up and settling her on the kitchen island, making her squeal. He sobered a little then. “Lizzie, can I ask you something?”

Taking his face in her hands, she let her thumbs stroke over his skin. “Of course, you can ask me anything.”

He nodded and absently started drawing small circles on her thighs. “Will you… are you…” He huffed, exasperated with himself. “Would you want to take my name?”

“Look at me?” She asked and he raised his head, wondering how he hadn’t noticed that he wasn’t. “Of course I want to. We’re a family and I want everyone to know that I’m the one that tamed Raymond Reddington.”

He smiled at her. “Good, because I don’t think anyone would believe me if you didn’t.”

She gave him a light shove. “You’re a dork,” she said, before giving him a kiss.

“Come on, we should pack. Did you want to leave in the morning? I’ll call the pilot to organize the departure.”

Liz held onto his shoulders as she slid down the kitchen island. “Sounds good. Aram will pick up Meagles later tonight.”

He nodded and went back towards the living room, where their son and cat were cuddling on the floor. “Get up, you little grub. You need to pack your toys.”

Tony kissed his furry buddy’s head and then carefully climbed to his feet. “Toy?”

Red hoisted him up and started walking towards the stairs. “Yep. We’re going on vacation. Well, that’s what your mother says, I don’t think Massachusetts is the place for vacations.”

The little one looked lost for a moment. “Mafufef?”

“Exactly what I was thinking.”

Her heart soared at the scene and she gently stroked over her still flat stomach. Her man was such a wonderful father and their son loved him dearly. Life couldn’t get much better, she was sure of it.

LizzingtonLizzingtonLizzington

Dembe was a wonderful friend and the best possible babysitter one could have. When Tony became a little restless about ten minutes into the flight, he was already getting some toys out so they could play. Not only did Tony love it, but it enabled Red and Lizzie to have a little quality time together. 

The flight to Boston didn’t take long and soon the four of them were getting into a car. Dembe didn’t like not knowing where they were going and he couldn’t understand why Liz didn’t want to tell him, with her insisting on giving him directions, but he had decided to humor her. It was after all their first vacation as a family.

“Alright, Ray, I want you to close your eyes.”

He raised a brow at her. “Why?”

“Just do it, okay?” She rolled her eyes.

Turning slightly in his seat, Red gave her a look. “I’m not sure I like where this is going.”

“Reddington. Your eyes. Close them. Now.” He frowned at the use of his last name, but didn’t protest further and closed his eyes. “And no peeking.”

“No peepin’!” Tony ordered also and Red blindly reached over to poke him in the belly, but relented.

The next few minutes were spent in relatively silence until he heard Liz asking Dembe to park.

“Can you help him get out? Make sure he keeps his eyes closed though.”

“This feels oddly like elementary school,” Red complained, waiting for his long time friend to help him outside. Moments later, he felt Liz taking his hand in hers. “You okay, sweetheart?” He asked upon noticing how her fingers were shaking slightly.

“Yeah, sure. Tony-baby, come with me.”

They made their way into a house and Red started feeling uneasy, he hated not being able to see. At least Dembe was still around in case something was going on.

“Hi.” He heard her greet softly. “I’m Elizabeth. It’s so nice to finally meet you.”

“Hello, dear.”

Red’s eyes snapped open at the sound of the voice. He almost couldn’t believe it. There in front of him was the woman he hadn’t seen in over twenty years…

Jean Reddington.

His mother.


	16. Chapter 16

“Hello, Raymond.”

He stood stock still, his face blank.

The elderly woman nodded and then her eyes settled on the youngest person. “And this is my sweet grandson?” She asked.

Liz wasn’t sure what to make of this, but somehow Red didn’t seem as excited as she had hoped; quite the opposite really. “Yes, this is Anthony. Tony, sweetheart, this is your grandma.”

The kid looked up at her. “Gwamma?”

Both women chuckled. “Aren’t you adorable?”

She nodded at her son. “Go say hi, baby.”

Letting go of his mother’s hand, Tony wobbled towards the elderly woman and smiled up at her, before stretching his arms out. “Up?”

He was picked up immediately and settled onto a hip. “Hello, my sweet boy.”

“Hi.”

“Ray? Honey?” Liz tried carefully. Her soon-to-be-husband hadn’t moved since opening his eyes. He ground his teeth together, the twitch under his eye coming to life. “Red?”

Without looking at her, he had turned towards her. “Can we talk.” It didn’t sound like a question. She nodded and with a quick smile at Jean, she followed him upstairs.

His back was a straight line, his shoulders tense as he led the way to a study, waiting until she had stepped over the threshold, before loudly closing it behind her. “How dare you?!”

She took a double-take. “Excuse me?”

He was up in her face in an instant, his eyes blazing dangerously. Never had she been afraid of the man they called Concierge of Crime and she wasn’t now either, but his behavior did scare her a little.

“You had no right!” He squinted at her.

“I had no right?! I had no right to want to find my son’s grandmother?! What the hell is wrong with you?! Can’t you just be grateful for once in your life?!” She was angry now too.

His breath was coming in short puffs and she could see the pulse beating violently under his skin. “This isn’t about you, none of this is!”

“You haven’t seen her in years, she’s an old lady, don’t you think she would want to see her son? Her grandson?”

“You have to get it through your skull that you don’t get to call the shots about every single thing in my life!” His hands moved angrily through the air, almost hitting her in the face.

She shoved at his chest then, trying to put some space between them. “Don’t talk to me like that. What the hell is wrong with you?”

“You ask me this?!” He asked incredulously. “You just do whatever the hell you like, whenever you like and expect everyone to just go with it!”

“Stop yelling at me! You know that’s not true,” She replied in a raised voice. “You’re behaving like I did the unforgivable thing!”

“For fuck’s sake, Elizabeth! This was not your decision to make! This isn’t any of your business!”

“If the woman who gave birth to you isn’t any of my business, then me and my children are none of yours!” She told him with tears in her eyes.

His nostrils flared at her words and he turned away, walking towards the window, desperately trying to calm down, leaving her to deal with the mess he thought she had created.

“I didn’t do it to hurt you, Raymond.” Wiping at the tears on her face, Liz exited the room and went back downstairs. The elderly woman gave her a sympathetic smile. “I’m sorry,” she said in a wobbly voice.

“Oh, dear. Raymond has always been thickheaded. Give him some time.”

She shook her head and wiped at her cheeks again. “You have my contact details if you ever want to get to know your grandchildren... I just… I can’t,” she whispered brokenly.

“Of course.” She knew exactly why the young woman felt the need to be away from all of this now. Jean hugged her grandson tightly, whispering in his ear that she would see him again soon.

Tony grinned at her. “Bye, gwamma,” he said joyfully, before walking towards his mother.

“Come on, baby.” With a last nod, the two of them left.

It took Red about half an hour to finally be calm again. Well, calm enough to not bash his fist into the nearest wall. He had heard Liz slipping out of the room, heard her sniffle. He had made her cry yet again, even though she had just wanted to help. But she just didn’t understand. 

Running his hand over his head, he pushed away from the window and opened the door and was greeted by something sparkling on the floor.

“No,” he breathed out. Kneeling down, he felt an icy fist close around his heart. It was her engagement ring. “No, no, no.” He straightened and quickly made his way downstairs. “Lizzie?” He looked around the room, but only his mother was still sitting in her chair. “Lizzie!”

“She left, Raymond.”

“No. Lizzie!” Pulling the front door open, he saw a startled Dembe. “Lizzie!”

“Raymond, she took her bags and got into a cab.”

He was breathing hard by now as a crushing fear enveloped his chest. “And you just let them leave?!”

Dembe frowned. “What was I supposed to do, Raymond?”

His shoulders fell, knowing that he had no one but himself to blame.

“You are an idiot,” Dembe told his friend.

“That he is.” He heard his mother from behind him. “You don’t have to stand outside. Please, come in.”

“Dembe, I need the phone.” He took the offered item. “Thank you.” Dembe patted him on the back and walked inside. He dialed her number, but only got her mailbox. “Lizzie, sweetheart, please. I’m sorry. Just come back please. Don’t leave. Don’t leave me. I love you, Lizzie, please.” He tried five more times, all with the same outcome; the anxiety almost making him vomit. 

“Raymond, come inside,” his mother said. “Give your girl some time to breathe and drink some coffee while you wait.”

He walked up to the small woman and stopped right in front of her. She had aged, but was still beautiful. “I lost her,” he told her, holding up the engagement ring.

“Don’t be ridiculous. She will calm down and then you can talk this out.” He shook his head, but she interrupted him, “you can fix this, if you just try. I let my son walk away from me once without a fight and I never saw him again. Don't be an idiot, Raymond.”

He bowed his head as tears welled up in his eyes and Jean wasted no time pulling him into a tight embrace. “I can’t lose her.”

“You won’t. Your Lizzie is a feisty one and I’m sure she can hold her own against you. But she loves you, Ray. She loves you dearly.”

“I know,” he choked out, hugging his mother back.

“Also she is supposed to be hormonal now.” 

He pulled his head back and Jean cupped her son’s face, stroking the tears away. “She told you?”

She shook her head. “She let the word ‘children’ slip. I just assumed.”

His smile was strained. “We’re having another baby.”

“See? Soon she will realize that talking about this will make it all good again.” She pulled her son’s head down to kiss his forehead gently. “Now, come in. I’m too old to be standing outside the house all day.”

Leading her long lost son inside, she made him sit down at the table and poured him some coffee. “I’d offer you some cake, but I think your big boy here is hungry for some dinner,” she laughed as Dembe grinned at her and even Red couldn’t keep a small smile off his face. Jean covered his hand with hers. “I missed you.”

“I missed you too.”


End file.
